Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

the line graph illustrates the number jobs in four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) of the economy of US in the year 1960 to 2020. jobs are calculated in millions

we can see in line graph that most number of jobs are in retail and healthcare both 16 millions in the year 2020 and lowest number of jobs people are doing is agriculture which is 2 millions in the same year 2020.

In 1960 manufacturing jobs were at 15 millions which increased in 198- to 20 millions then it gradually decreased to 17 millions in 2000 and 13 millions in 2020. while retail was 6 millions in 1960 and raised gradually from 1980 to 2020.

while both healtrhcare and retail jobs were increased the manufacturing and agriculture jobs fall down significantly. Agriculture jobs started at 6 millions and falled to 3 millions. And healthcare jobs started a6t 3 millions and ended up in 16 miilons in the year 2020.

so we can see a lot have changed in US job market from the year 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for the four sectors. However, the overview is weak; it merely lists the final figures for 2020 rather than highlighting the significant overall trends, such as the growth in service-related sectors versus the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. The data reporting is generally accurate, but there are some inconsistencies in the figures cited (e.g., mentioning 198- instead of 1980). To reach a higher band, ensure the overview provides a clear summary of the most significant trends rather than just listing data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. However, the logical progression is somewhat disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is limited and occasionally mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'while' and 'and'. The transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs is abrupt. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, such as grouping sectors by their performance (e.g., those that grew versus those that declined) rather than jumping between sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There are several spelling errors, such as 'healtrhcare', 'miilons', and 'falled' (instead of 'fell'). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited, relying on basic verbs like 'increased' and 'decreased'. To improve, incorporate more sophisticated synonyms and ensure accurate spelling. Using more precise terminology for trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'experienced a downward trend', would demonstrate a better command of lexical resources.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede readability. Issues include missing articles ('the US'), incorrect verb forms ('jobs... are calculated'), and punctuation errors. For example, 'jobs are calculated in millions' should be 'The number of jobs is measured in millions'. Additionally, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and tense consistency. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy, particularly regarding articles, pluralisation, and consistent verb tenses when describing past data.

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