Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The line chart illustrates the number of jobs among four distinct sectors of the economy in the US, from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, jobs in retail and healthcare sectors increased over the period, while the opposite trend was observed in manufacturing and agricultural areas. Additionally, manufacturing was the most popular job sector before 2000.

In 1960, the highest number of people were employed in manufacturing with 15 million jobs, before peaking in 1980, reaching 20 million jobs. After that, the figures began to decrease, falling around 13 million jobs. Citizens employed in agriculture stood at approximately 6 million jobs in 1960, which declined consistently to 3 million jobs by 2020.

Jobs in retail were at same level as agriculture's in 1960. While the figures for agriculture plummeted, the employment in retail sector grew over the time, reaching roughly 16 million jobs. Healthcare had the lowest number of jobs in 1960 with nearly 2.5 million employees. The figure surged throughout the period, standing at 16 million by 2020, same level as retail.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response effectively identifies the main trends and provides a clear overview. You successfully highlighted the contrasting movements between the sectors, such as the growth in retail and healthcare versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. Key features, including the peak of manufacturing in 1980 and the convergence of retail and healthcare by 2020, are well-supported with data. To reach a higher band, ensure that all comparisons are fully explicit; for instance, while you mention the 1960 starting points, a more direct comparison of the final 2020 figures across all four sectors would strengthen the analysis. Overall, the task is well-addressed with relevant data points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The essay is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group the sectors effectively. The progression of ideas is smooth, moving from the general trends to specific data points. Cohesive devices such as 'Additionally', 'In 1960', and 'While' are used appropriately to link sentences and ideas. The paragraphing is logical, separating the declining sectors from the growing ones. To improve, ensure that referencing is always precise; for example, 'the figures' could occasionally be replaced with more specific nouns to avoid ambiguity, though the current flow is already quite clear and easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey information with precision. Phrases like 'plummeted', 'surged', and 'opposite trend' are used effectively to describe the data. There is a good awareness of collocation, such as 'distinct sectors' and 'employment in retail sector'. While the vocabulary is accurate and appropriate for the task, incorporating a few more sophisticated or less common lexical items related to economic trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'marginal') would elevate the response further. The current usage is natural and does not impede communication, showing a solid command of topic-specific language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the use of participial phrases ('reaching 20 million jobs') and subordinate clauses ('While the figures for agriculture plummeted...'). Most sentences are error-free, and the grammar is generally controlled. There are minor slips, such as 'at same level as agriculture's' (missing an article 'the') and 'employment in retail sector' (missing 'the'). However, these errors are infrequent and do not hinder the reader's understanding. To achieve a higher score, ensure consistent use of articles and prepositions, and try to incorporate a wider variety of complex grammatical structures to demonstrate greater flexibility.

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