Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four different sectors of the economy in US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, Retail sector remained the most popular choice as it continuously rose. In contrast, jobs in manufacturing sector is in demand for first two year than sudden decline happen. wheras, Healthcare is also similar to retail with continuous incline and agriculture sector is also dropped rapidly.

In 1960, jobs in manufacturing sector was the highest with 15 millions and rose gradually to 20 million in 1980. Than the sudden decline in 2000 and 2020 with 17 million and 13 million respectively. On the other hand, vaccancies in Retail and healthcare sector increased constan Consistently every year. In 1960, retail jobs increased from 6 million to 15 million in 2000 and 16 million in 2020.

In healthcare sector, 2 million jobs in 1960, 11 million in 2000 than same as retail with 16 million in 2020. However, agriculture sector saw a sharp decline from 8million in 1960 to remain almost constant in 1980 and 2000, with 3 million and slightly fall to 2million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response provides a clear overview of the main trends, identifying the growth in retail and healthcare alongside the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the data reporting is inconsistent and contains inaccuracies. For instance, you state manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980, but the graph shows it peaking closer to 1980 at a different level, and your description of the retail sector's peak is slightly imprecise. While you cover all four sectors, the lack of precision in data interpretation and some confusion regarding the timeline (e.g., 'first two year') prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure that data points are read accurately from the axes and that comparisons are clearly linked to specific years.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the information. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'On the other hand', and 'However'. However, the flow is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing and mechanical transitions. For example, 'wheras, Healthcare is also similar' is grammatically disjointed. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes unclear, and the progression between sentences could be smoother. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'illustrates', 'decline', 'vacancies', and 'consistently'. However, there are several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'constan Consistently' and 'incline' (where 'increase' or 'growth' would be more appropriate). Some phrasing is repetitive, and the use of 'popular choice' to describe job sectors is slightly unnatural in this context. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations related to data trends and ensure that your spelling is accurate throughout the response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'jobs in manufacturing sector is'), incorrect tense usage (e.g., 'sudden decline happen'), and missing articles. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and capitalisation. While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of errors in basic sentence construction limits the score. To improve, proofread your work specifically for subject-verb agreement and ensure that your verb tenses are consistent when describing past data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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