Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-11

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrate the number of jobs in different four sector of economy in manufacturing retail agriculture and health care from time period of 1960 to 2020 . The figure is measured in million .

overall, manufacturing had the highest of jobs at beginning and reached to its peak at 1980 and then get the decline after that whereas retail and health care showed the constant increasing however agriculture remained low relatively .

In 1960 manufacturing there was 15 million jobs which increased to 20 million in 1980 after that it showed decrease had reached to 13 million jobs in 2020 . Retail had showed increasing in job from 1960 to 5 million and reached to 16 million at the end of the time and the same tre

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While you have identified the main trends, the summary is incomplete as the text cuts off mid-sentence at the end. You have highlighted the peak of manufacturing and the general trends for the other sectors, but the lack of a complete analysis and the failure to reach the minimum length means the task is not fully addressed. To improve, ensure you complete your analysis of all four sectors and provide a clear, finished overview.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay has a basic structure, including an introduction and an overview. However, the progression of ideas is interrupted by the incomplete nature of the final sentence. Cohesive devices are used in a mechanical way, such as 'overall' and 'whereas', but the lack of a proper conclusion or a fully developed body paragraph makes the flow disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider range of linking words to connect your sentences and ensure that your paragraphs are fully developed and logically sequenced.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive. You use basic terms like 'increased' and 'showed' multiple times. There are also errors in word formation and collocation, such as 'different four sector of economy' instead of 'four different economic sectors' and 'get the decline' instead of 'declined'. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a downward trend', and pay closer attention to pluralization and article usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('The line graph illustrate'), missing articles ('at beginning'), and incorrect tense usage ('Retail had showed increasing'). The sentence structures are mostly simple, and the attempt at complex structures is hindered by errors. The incomplete final sentence also leaves the grammar unfinished. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that you use the correct tense when describing historical data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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