Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrate the available jobs in Us in four sectors of 60 years.It gives the information of year 1960 to 2020.
Overall,firstly according to the graph it tell us the US economy jobs in million .The sector are retail, agriculture,healthcare, and manufacturing.In manufacturing and retail department the ratio of jobs were on peak in the start.
secondly, the jobs in agriculture and healthcare department in starting were on fluctation.in addition to this later on availability of jobs in healthcare were increasing.But in agriculture department jobs were decreasing same like this in manufacturing after a high increment in jobs it also decreasing but jobs in retail department increasing slowly year by year.
In conclusion ,in availability of jobs in retail and healthcare after fall it were increasing but in manufacturing and healthcare department after flow up it starting decreased of US economy in 60 years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which negatively impacts the score. While you have identified the four sectors and attempted to describe trends, the analysis is superficial and lacks specific data points (e.g., specific years or job numbers). The overview is vague, and the description of trends is often inaccurate or confusing, such as claiming manufacturing was at a peak in the start when the graph shows a different trajectory. To improve, ensure you include precise figures from the graph and provide a clearer, more accurate summary of the main trends and comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inappropriate, such as the repetitive use of 'secondly' and 'in addition to this'. Referencing is often unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow which sector is being discussed. The conclusion is repetitive and does not effectively synthesise the information presented. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus that connects logically to the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'jobs', 'increasing', and 'decreasing' throughout the text. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'ratio of jobs were on peak' and 'after flow up it starting decreased'. These errors occasionally impede the clarity of your message. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'declined', or 'remained stable', and work on using these words in their correct grammatical context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The line graph illustrate', 'The sector are'), article usage, and sentence structure. Complex sentence structures are attempted but are often faulty, leading to confusion. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after commas and periods. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically ensuring that subjects and verbs agree and that you use articles correctly before nouns. Proofreading for basic punctuation and capitalization errors would also significantly improve the quality of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.