Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph provides the information about the number of job in four different sectors in the United States's economy from 2019 to 2020.

Overall, it can seen that four different line represents different jobs in the economy of US, where two job sectors increased the number of jobs moderately. On the other hand another two declined the number of jobs over time, and all jobs counts in millions.

In year 1980, all four job sectors went up despite the agriculture job sector. At this time, most number of jobs were available in manufacturing industries at twenty millions whereas agricultural jobs down to about millions from six millions over 20 years from 1960 to 1980. After 1980, while agricultural employability remain stable and slightly decreased at 2020 at two millions. Nevertheless, manufacturing jobs decreased significantly after 1980 and in 2020, it was only 13 millions.

Over this seventy years, retail and healthcare showed significantly up trend among other job sectors. They started with 3 to 6 millions job in 1960 but both finished at over 16 millions job sectors of the economy in the United States.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for the four sectors. However, there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting. For example, you state the period is '2019 to 2020' instead of 1960 to 2020, and you mention 'seventy years' when the graph spans sixty years. Furthermore, some data points are unclear, such as 'agricultural jobs down to about millions', which lacks a specific figure. While you attempt to compare the sectors, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher score. To improve, ensure you carefully transcribe the years and figures provided in the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices like 'Overall', 'On the other hand', and 'Nevertheless' to link ideas. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. For instance, the transition between the 1980s data and the 2020 data is somewhat abrupt. The use of cohesive devices is occasionally mechanical or misused, such as the phrase 'in 2020, it was only 13 millions' following a sentence about agricultural employability. Improving the flow between sentences would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks precision. You use terms like 'job sectors', 'industries', and 'employability', which are relevant. However, there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'all jobs counts in millions' (should be 'job counts') and 'showed significantly up trend' (should be 'showed a significant upward trend'). Additionally, there are repetitive structures regarding the mention of 'millions'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and varying your descriptive language for trends, such as 'experienced a steady decline' or 'witnessed a sharp increase'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'it can seen that' (should be 'it can be seen that'), 'four different line represents' (should be 'four different lines represent'), and 'agricultural employability remain stable' (should be 'remained'). Punctuation is generally functional, but subject-verb agreement and article usage are inconsistent throughout the text. While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors limits the score. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy and proofreading for subject-verb agreement will help improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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