Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in us from 1960 to 2022. The jobs calibre in millions.

Overall, it can be seen that the manufacturing department had the highest number of jobs while there was least jobs in healthcare sector.However, the number has faluctuated for all the sectors over the period.

In 1960, Manufacturing was most popular department and was offering around 15 millions jobs where retails was at very less point, just above 5 millions. Job demand increased in both sectors manufacturing and retails and reached at 20 and 10 millions, respectively in next 20 years. afterwards there was steadily decline for manufacturing by around 7 millions for next 40 years, nevertheless there were rise in retail sectors and number of jobs accounted for over 15 millions in 2020.

Proceeding further, jobs for agriculture department dropped for whole period recorded around 3 millions in 1980 and similarly it decreased again for next 40 years by 1 million. In contrast, healthcare did the progress and accounted for 10 millions in 1980 and later also increased and number for 2000 and 2020 were approx 11 and 16 millions, respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying trends for all four sectors. However, there are inaccuracies in data reporting; for instance, the text claims manufacturing had the highest number of jobs throughout, but the graph shows healthcare overtaking it by 2020. The overview is present but slightly inaccurate regarding the 'fluctuation' claim, as some sectors show consistent trends (e.g., agriculture). The summary is functional but lacks the precision required for a higher band, as some data points are misread or vaguely described.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'In 1960', 'afterwards', and 'In contrast', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'Proceeding further'. The referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be smoother to better connect the data points being compared.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There are several word-choice errors and non-standard collocations, such as 'jobs calibre', 'retails was at very less point', and 'did the progress'. These errors occasionally impede the flow of information. While the student attempts to use sector-specific terminology, the lack of control over basic academic phrasing limits the score. More precise verbs like 'plummeted', 'surpassed', or 'fluctuated' would improve the quality.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, including missing articles ('in us', 'in healthcare sector'), subject-verb agreement issues ('there was least jobs'), and incorrect preposition usage ('reached at'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with spacing around commas and periods. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.