Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph below gives information about the numbers of jobs in four sectors of the economy is the united states between the period of 1960 to 2020.
Overall this graph give information about four sectors the economy in us from 1960 to 2020.The first sector is manufacturing second is retail and third is agriculture and last one is healthcare.
Well the economy in 1960 is all four sectors is limited. But by the time it increasing rapidly. In graph they mentioned in 1960 the economy was 5 million but by the time is passing it grows and in 1980 all sectors grow very fast and number is increasing and it touched by 20 million. As we can see in 2020 the numbers of economy just dropped and touched to 13 million.
Overall the economy of us is rapidly growing no 1 economy in the world. In june 2026 us economy is 73 billion dollar this is huge numbers.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to accurately report the main features of the graph. You have not described the trends for the four specific sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare) over the 60-year period. Instead, you provided inaccurate data (e.g., mentioning 5 million or 73 billion dollars, which are not supported by the provided graph) and included irrelevant information about the US economy in 2026. To improve, you must focus strictly on the data presented in the graph, identify the starting and ending points for each sector, and highlight significant changes or comparisons between them rather than introducing external knowledge or incorrect figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into short, disjointed paragraphs that lack logical progression. While there is an attempt at an introduction and an overview, the ideas within the body paragraphs are not clearly linked. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and often repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'by the time'. The transition between the description of the graph and the final paragraph is abrupt and confusing, making it difficult for the reader to follow the development of your argument. Using a wider range of linking words like 'consequently', 'in contrast', or 'furthermore' would help improve the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You rely on basic terms like 'growing', 'increasing', and 'number', which restricts your ability to describe the trends precisely. There are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'the economy is limited' and 'the numbers of economy just dropped'. Furthermore, the inclusion of irrelevant information regarding '73 billion dollar' suggests a misunderstanding of the task requirements. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', or 'experienced a downward trend'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'this graph give information'), incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'the economy is all four sectors is limited'), and awkward sentence structures. Many sentences are simple, and there is a lack of complex grammatical structures. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after periods. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring that your verbs agree with their subjects, and practicing the use of complex sentences to describe trends over time.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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