Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph gives data about jobs in four different financial sectors in the us from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, The vacancy in Manufacturing and Agriculture sectors are slightly dicreased and other two sectors Retail and health care were significantly increased during 1960 to 2020.

The healthcare and Retail sectors was 2 million in 1960 and slight reached five million in 1980 and dramatically cross ten million in 2000 and both sectors crossed the fifteen million in 2020.

Other two financial sectors manufacturing and agriculture , there was fifteen million jobs in manufacturing sectors and it reached 20 million in 1980 but after that it significantly decreased and reached 12 million in 2020 , but agriculture in 1960 was 6 million and it slightly went down in 1980 it was

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the task achievement score. While you have identified the main trends, the description is incomplete; the final sentence is cut off mid-thought, leaving the data for the agriculture sector unfinished. Furthermore, the overview is somewhat inaccurate, as it describes the manufacturing sector as having 'slightly decreased' when the data shows a significant decline from its peak. To improve, ensure you complete all sentences, provide a full summary of all data points, and verify that your overview accurately reflects the overall trends shown in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes mechanical. For example, the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is abrupt. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'Other two financial sectors', which lacks a proper linking word to connect it to the previous paragraph. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'In contrast', 'Furthermore', 'Subsequently') to guide the reader through your analysis and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, logical flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for a higher band. There are several spelling errors, such as 'dicreased' instead of 'decreased', and some awkward phrasing like 'slight reached' and 'dramatically cross'. The term 'financial sectors' is also used incorrectly, as the graph refers to economic sectors. To improve, focus on using more precise verbs and adverbs to describe trends, such as 'plummeted' or 'steadily rose', and ensure you use the correct terminology for the data provided in the prompt.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'The healthcare and Retail sectors was'), incorrect preposition usage, and incomplete sentences. The punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with capitalization after commas. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and ensure that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound. Practicing the use of complex sentences with correct relative clauses or subordinating conjunctions will also help improve your range and accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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