Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 8.5)
The line graph illustrates changes in the number of jobs, measured in millions, in four sectors of the US economy—manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare—between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, manufacturing employed the largest number of people for most of the period, although its figure declined considerably after reaching a peak in 1980. By contrast, employment in retail and healthcare increased substantially, while agriculture experienced a gradual overall decline. By 2020, retail and healthcare had become the largest employers.
In 1960, manufacturing accounted for 15 million jobs, considerably more than the other three sectors, which each employed between 2 and 6 million people. Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of 20 million in 1980 before falling to 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020.
Retail followed a very different trend, increasing steadily from 6 million jobs in 1960 to 10 million in 1980 and 15 million in 2000, before reaching 16 million in 2020. Healthcare also saw strong growth, rising from just 2 million jobs in 1960 to 5 million in 1980 and 11 million in 2000, eventually matching retail at 16 million in 2020.
Agriculture was the only sector to decline consistently overall. Its employment fell from 6 million in 1960 to 3 million in 1980 and remained unchanged in 2000, before dropping further to just 2 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 8.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 8.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 8.5 |
| Overall | 8.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5
The response is excellent and fully addresses all parts of the task. You have provided a clear overview of the main trends, such as the decline of manufacturing and the growth of the retail and healthcare sectors. You have also successfully selected key data points to support your descriptions, such as the peak in 1980 for manufacturing and the final figures in 2020. The comparisons between sectors are well-integrated throughout the report, demonstrating a strong ability to synthesize information from the graph. No key features were overlooked, and the information is presented in a logical and accurate manner.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5
The response is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a distinct focus, moving from the introduction and overview to specific details for each sector. Cohesive devices such as 'By contrast', 'while', and 'before reaching' are used effectively to link sentences and clauses. The paragraphing is skillful, and the information flows smoothly from one point to the next without any confusion. The structure is entirely appropriate for an academic report, and the use of referencing is clear throughout.
Lexical Resource — Band 8.0
You have used a wide range of vocabulary with precision and natural control. Phrases like 'experienced a gradual overall decline', 'accounted for', and 'matching retail' demonstrate a sophisticated command of language suitable for an academic context. The vocabulary is varied and avoids unnecessary repetition. There are no errors in word choice or collocation, and the terminology used to describe the trends (e.g., 'peak', 'steady growth', 'decline') is accurate and well-placed.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5
The response displays a wide range of grammatical structures with full flexibility and accuracy. You have successfully used complex sentences, such as 'Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of 20 million in 1980 before falling to 17 million in 2000', which are error-free. Punctuation is used correctly throughout, and there are no grammatical slips. The control over tense and subject-verb agreement is consistent, and the writing is highly readable and professional.
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