Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 8.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020, with figures given in millions.
Overall, employment in retail and healthcare increased considerably over the period, whereas agriculture experienced a continuous decline. Manufacturing was the largest source of employment at the beginning and reached a peak in 1980, but its figure then fell. By 2020, healthcare had become the largest employer, while agriculture had the fewest jobs.
In 1960, manufacturing provided approximately 15 million jobs, compared with around 6 million in both retail and agriculture. Healthcare was the smallest sector, with about 2 million jobs. Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of roughly 20 million in 1980, before declining gradually to around 13 million in 2020.
Agriculture followed a very different pattern. Its employment figure fell from about 6 million in 1960 to approximately 3 million in 1980. It remained relatively stable until 2000, after which it decreased further, reaching only about 2 million jobs in 2020.
In contrast, both retail and healthcare grew throughout the period. Retail employment increased from around 6 million in 1960 to 10 million in 1980 and continued rising to approximately 15 million by 2020. Healthcare showed the most significant growth, increasing from about 2 million to 5 million in 1980 and then rising sharply to around 16 million at the end of the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 8.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 8.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 8.5 |
| Overall | 8.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5
The response is excellent and fully addresses all parts of the task. You have provided a clear overview of the main trends, such as the growth in retail and healthcare versus the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. The key features are well-selected, and you have made relevant comparisons throughout the report, such as contrasting the starting positions in 1960 with the final outcomes in 2020. The data is accurately reported, and the structure allows the reader to follow the trends in each sector logically. There are no omissions of significant data points.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5
The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the data, which makes the information easy to follow. You have used a variety of cohesive devices effectively, such as 'In contrast', 'whereas', and 'before declining gradually', which help to link sentences and ideas smoothly. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the detailed body paragraphs. The flow of information is natural and unobtrusive throughout the entire response.
Lexical Resource — Band 8.0
You have demonstrated a wide and precise range of vocabulary appropriate for an academic report. Phrases such as 'continuous decline', 'largest source of employment', and 'rising sharply' show a sophisticated control of language. The use of terminology is accurate, and there are no noticeable errors in word choice or collocation. You have successfully avoided repetition by using varied descriptors for the trends observed in the graph, which adds to the fluency and professional tone of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5
The response exhibits a wide range of grammatical structures with high accuracy. You have successfully used complex sentences, such as 'Manufacturing employment then rose to a peak of roughly 20 million in 1980, before declining gradually to around 13 million in 2020.' Punctuation is used correctly to support the clarity of your sentences. The majority of your sentences are error-free, and the control over tense and subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the text. There are no grammatical slips that impede communication.
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