Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The given line chart shows the information about the count of jobs in four distinct sectors of the economy in the untied states from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it can be clearly seen that after 1980 the figures of manufacturing, retail and healthcare showed huge changes. However, agriculture sector remained at almost similar number after 1980.

To begin with, the number of jobs showed by a figure in retail and agriculture field was exactly similar at 6 million in 1960. In addition to this, the count of jobs in manufacturing was 15 million, which was 14 million more than healthcare in 1960. 10 million jobs were noticed in retail sector, which was exactly half than manufacturing.

However, the figure of agriculture remained at almost 3million until 2000; however, than it decreased to 2million in 2020. In 2000, the figure of jobs in manufacturing was 17 million, followed by retail sector at 15 million and healthcare at 11million. Lastly, the respective figures of jobs showed by healthcare, retail and manufacturing sector were 11.5 million,11 million and 13 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview of the trends. However, there are inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you state that retail and agriculture were 'exactly similar at 6 million' in 1960, but the graph shows retail was significantly higher. Additionally, the statement that manufacturing was '14 million more than healthcare' in 1960 is mathematically incorrect based on the visual data. While you identify the main features, the precision of the data extraction is inconsistent, which limits the score. To improve, ensure that you carefully verify the values against the axes before writing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'In addition to this', and 'However' to link ideas. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and the flow between sentences in the second body paragraph is occasionally disjointed. The paragraphing is appropriate, and the progression of information is generally clear, though the internal logic of the comparisons could be strengthened by grouping the data more effectively by trend rather than just listing figures.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing you to describe the trends using terms like 'sectors', 'economy', 'figures', and 'decreased'. However, the range is somewhat limited and repetitive. There are also minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'untied states' (United States) and 'than it decreased' (then it decreased). To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise reporting verbs and nouns, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a downward trend', rather than relying on 'showed' or 'figure'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'the number of jobs showed by a figure' (awkward phrasing), 'exactly half than' (should be 'half of'), and 'than it decreased' (should be 'then'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, though there are missing spaces after commas in some instances. The majority of your sentences are understandable, but the frequency of these minor errors prevents a higher score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and correct comparative structures.

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