Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line chart illustrates the information regarding the amount of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the dominant sector was Manufacturing and minor was Healthcare over the period.
To begin with Retail and Healthcare sectors followed same trend. Retail sector was around 6 million. Then it was rapidly inclined and pecked at 15 million in 2000 afterwards it was gradually increase by 1 million in 2020.
Healthcare was 2 million in starting and it was fluctuated and reached at the 16 million during the period.
The manufacture sector was 15 million in starting period and it was sharply increased in the year of 1980 at 20 million. after that it was slightly go down over the period and reached around 13 million. Agriculture was led 6 million in starting then it was decrease in 1980 at 3 million after that it was gradually declined and reached at 2 million over the period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview. However, the data reporting is inconsistent and contains inaccuracies. For instance, you state that the Manufacturing sector 'pecked' (peaked) at 20 million in 1980, but the graph shows the peak occurred earlier. Additionally, the description of the Healthcare sector as 'minor' at the start is accurate, but the overall summary lacks a cohesive synthesis of the trends. While the main features are identified, the lack of precision in reporting the figures and the failure to make meaningful comparisons between the sectors limit the score. To improve, ensure that data points are read accurately and that you group information logically rather than just listing each sector individually.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate. Phrases like 'To begin with' are used to introduce a paragraph, but the internal flow within paragraphs is disjointed. For example, the transition 'afterwards it was gradually increase' lacks proper grammatical connection. The referencing is also occasionally unclear, making the progression of ideas feel somewhat repetitive. To achieve a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'meanwhile', 'in contrast', 'subsequently') and ensure that each sentence flows logically from the previous one.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary range is adequate for the task but lacks precision. There are several instances of incorrect word choice, such as 'pecked' instead of 'peaked', 'inclined' used incorrectly for 'increased', and 'led' used instead of 'started at'. These errors occasionally impede the clarity of the report. While you attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary, the repetition of basic verbs like 'increased' and 'decreased' limits the sophistication of the writing. To improve, focus on learning collocations related to trends, such as 'witnessed a sharp rise' or 'experienced a gradual decline', and ensure you check the spelling of key terms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. Common issues include incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'it was gradually increase'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'Healthcare was 2 million in starting'). The misuse of passive voice and tense inconsistencies—such as 'it was fluctuated'—demonstrates a lack of control over complex structures. While the meaning is generally understandable, these persistent errors prevent the writing from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of past tense when describing historical data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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