Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Line graph.

Task-1. Cambridge-21 test 1.

→ The line graph illustrates the number of jobs work or available in four various sectors including Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare in US from 1960 to 2020.

→ Overall, it is reported that there were increes gradual increased in the demand for agriculture and retail jobs and reached to peak level. However, The constant decline noticed for healthcare sector throughout the given period of time.

→ To start with, Manufacturing sector, there was a sharp incline trend in 1960 to 1980, then which was around 20 millions jobs, however there was consey constant decreased in jobs for 40 years and reached to it's lowest level at 13 millions. Furthermore, Retail and Agriculture is the sectore which provided maximum job by the end of given period, as, in 1980, both sectors were at bottom level at by 5 million and 3 million respectively.

→ From 1980 to 2020, The line graph of Retail and Agriculture was rose steadily and reached to top level which was 16 million for both sectors.

It can be observed that the trend for healthcare sectors was declined for 20 year, which was around 3 million in 1980 and remained stable for next 40 years.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers the main features of the graph, but there are significant inaccuracies in the data interpretation. For instance, the student claims the healthcare sector experienced a 'constant decline' and remained stable, which contradicts the visual data showing it as the highest sector for much of the period. Furthermore, the description of the trends for Agriculture and Retail is confusing and misrepresents the data points. While the overview is attempted, it lacks precision and fails to accurately reflect the key trends. To improve, ensure that data points are read carefully and that the summary highlights the most significant changes rather than listing individual points inaccurately.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by awkward phrasing and confusing transitions. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'To start with' and 'Furthermore', which do not effectively link the ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of the data. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks the necessary cohesion to guide the reader smoothly through the comparison of the four sectors. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring clear topic sentences would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and contains several errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'increes', 'consey', and 'sectore'. The range of vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying on simple descriptors like 'top level' or 'bottom level'. There is little evidence of the ability to use less common lexical items or precise terminology related to data description (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained constant'). To reach a higher band, the student should focus on learning topic-specific vocabulary for describing trends and graphs, and pay closer attention to spelling and accurate word formation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('Retail and Agriculture is the sectore'), article usage ('in US'), and sentence structure ('then which was around 20 millions jobs'). The attempt at complex sentences often results in fragmented or run-on sentences, such as 'Manufacturing sector, there was a sharp incline trend...'. While the meaning is generally discernible, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and punctuation limits the score. Focusing on sentence construction and proofreading for basic errors would be highly beneficial.

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