Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph is showing the information of jobs in various sectors e.g. (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture and Healthcare).

Horizantal line showing the years in decades as well and the vertical line in the graph is showing the job vacancies in millions.

We begin with Manufacturing Sector as shown in the graph, as we can see at the start in 1960's the trend of manufacturing jobs was so high and it increased in 1980's. But after this decade (1980) there is decline in jobs in Manufacturing Sector. At start there were 15 million manufacturing jobs and increased in 1980 with a number of 20 million. But in 2000 and 2020 there is a decline in these jobs.

Now we can see Other job sectors like retails it continusouly growing with time. In 1960 there were around 6 million jobs and this number is increased later with 15 million plus jobs.

Now we move on Agriculture Jobs, which are decreasing with time and the number falls between 1 to 5 million jobs in 2020.

The last one is healthcare sector and there is a smooth demand in jobs in healthcare sector which is reached 15 million plus at the end of 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph, but the analysis is quite superficial. While you identify the main trends, you lack a clear overview or summary of the most significant changes, which is essential for Task 1. The description of the data is often imprecise; for example, stating '15 million plus' or 'between 1 to 5 million' lacks the precision required for Academic Task 1. To improve, ensure you highlight the most striking differences or similarities between the sectors rather than simply listing them one by one. You should also aim to group the data more effectively to show a clear comparison.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical. You rely heavily on simple transition phrases like 'We begin with', 'Now we can see', and 'Now we move on', which makes the flow feel repetitive. There is a lack of sophisticated cohesive devices to link sentences and ideas more naturally. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'In contrast', 'Conversely', 'Meanwhile') and ensure that your referencing is clear throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but remains quite basic and repetitive. You frequently use phrases like 'there is a' or 'the number of', which limits the range of your expression. There are also some minor errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'Horizantal' (horizontal) and 'continusouly' (continuously). To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise vocabulary related to trends and data, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a steady decline', rather than relying on simple descriptions of growth or decrease.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentences, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Issues include incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'The graph is showing' instead of 'The graph shows'), missing articles, and awkward phrasing like 'the trend of manufacturing jobs was so high'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of parentheses and commas. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Additionally, try to vary your sentence structures by using more complex clauses to describe the data trends more accurately.

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