Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The provided line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. The jobs were paid in millions. Overall, the number of jobs in healthcare sector was soared while count of jobs in manufacturing was declined.

To begin, in healthcare sector of economy in the US, the number of jobs was increased slightly in two year till 1980 with 5 million of jobs while they rose steadily between 2000 and 2020 from 11 to 15 millions of jobs. Manufacturing sector levelled up from 15 to 20 millions of jobs from 1960 to 1980, but in contrast it was plummeted to 13 millions of jobs at the end year 2020.

Furthermore, retail sector represented drastic rise till 2000 with 15 millions of jobs while showed very slight increase at 2020. Consequently, the number of jobs in agriculture sector of economy in US, depicted the drop down in 1960 from 5 millions than it remained unchanged from 1980 to 2000 led to slighter levelled off at the ending year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response provides a clear overview and identifies the main trends for all four sectors. However, the data reporting is inconsistent and occasionally inaccurate. For instance, stating that manufacturing 'levelled up' from 15 to 20 million between 1960 and 1980 is a misinterpretation of the trend, and the description of the agriculture sector is confusing and lacks precision. While the key features are selected, the lack of accuracy in reporting the figures prevents a higher band. To improve, ensure that the data points cited directly match the visual information provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a summary. Cohesive devices such as 'To begin', 'Furthermore', and 'Consequently' are used to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as the transition to the agriculture sector. Additionally, the internal structure of the sentences is occasionally disjointed, which affects the flow of information. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph focuses on a clear thematic grouping would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation. Phrases like 'was soared', 'count of jobs', and 'slighter levelled off' are non-standard and impede the precision of the report. While the student attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary (e.g., 'manufacturing sector', 'economy'), the misuse of verbs and prepositions limits the effectiveness of the communication. Focusing on the correct usage of reporting verbs and collocations related to trends would significantly improve the lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include incorrect verb forms (e.g., 'was soared', 'was declined', 'was plummeted'), misuse of articles, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'at the end year 2020'). These errors are persistent and sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. To reach a higher band, the student needs to focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive versus active voice when describing data trends.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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