Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The presented line chart depicts the information regarding the number of jobs in manufacturing , retail , agriculture and healthcare sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020 .
Overall, it can be observed that in the year 1960 the number of occupation in healthcare sector was least while manufacturing contain highest number of jobs , however healthcare and retail sectors followed the opposite trend .
Turning to the details , it is evident that the retail and healthcare figure was going rose .At the starting, availability of work in the retail sector was 5 million . During the year 2020 , both figures reached at the maximum level , it was 16 million .
Moving further, manufacturing and agriculture figures followed the decreased trend . In the year 1960 , the number if jobs in both sectors was , 15 million in manufacturing sector and 6 million in agriculture sector . Both farming and retail figures started at the same level . During 1980, manufacturing reached at the peak level , it was 20 million . At the end of the year , manufacturing sector contain 13 million job and agriculture consist 3 million jobs .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response provides a clear overview of the trends, identifying the main features such as the growth in healthcare and retail and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the report lacks precision in data reporting. For instance, stating that retail and healthcare reached 16 million in 2020 is a good summary, but the description of the manufacturing peak in 1980 is slightly confusing in its phrasing. The response covers all four sectors, but the analysis could be more detailed by making more explicit comparisons between the sectors at specific time intervals, rather than just listing trends for each group separately.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Turning to the details' and 'Moving further', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'At the starting' and 'At the end of the year'. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear; for example, the sentence 'Both farming and retail figures started at the same level' lacks a clear connection to the previous data points mentioned. Overall, the progression is logical, but the flow between sentences could be smoother.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to describe trends (e.g., 'followed the decreased trend', 'reached at the peak level'). However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations, such as 'number of occupation' instead of 'number of jobs' and 'manufacturing contain highest number' instead of 'manufacturing contained the highest number'. The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, relying on basic descriptors. To reach a higher band, the student should incorporate more varied synonyms for growth and decline and improve the accuracy of word forms.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('manufacturing contain', 'agriculture consist'), incorrect preposition usage ('reached at the peak'), and tense inconsistencies. For example, 'the retail and healthcare figure was going rose' is grammatically incorrect. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. The student needs to focus on consistent verb tenses when describing past data and ensure correct subject-verb agreement to improve clarity and accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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