Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph provides information about the economical jobs in US between 1960 to 2020 in the four sectors.
The line graph provides the data about manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. Overall a gradual rise can be seen in retail and healthcare jobs with the passage of time. On the contrary side manufacturing jobs were increasing between 1960 to 1980 and then sudden fall can be seen in this field of jobs.
The line graph shows agriculture jobs were continuously decreasing from 1960 to the 2020 however massive fall can be seen from 1960 to 1980 which results in less opportunity of jobs.
Agriculture jobs were decreasing steadily with the passage of time from 1980 to 2020.
Overall the graph illustrates that retail and healthcare jobs are increasing with the passage of time on the opposite side manufacturing and agriculture jobs are decreasing with the passage of time from 1960 to 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the task by identifying the main trends for the four sectors. However, the analysis is quite superficial. While you mention the general trends, you fail to provide specific data points or comparative figures from the graph to support your descriptions, which is a requirement for a higher band. The summary is repetitive, particularly in the final paragraph, which restates information already provided. To improve, ensure you select key data points (e.g., starting and ending values or peak years) to illustrate the trends more precisely rather than relying on vague descriptions like 'gradual rise' or 'massive fall'.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The information is presented in a somewhat disjointed manner, and the final paragraph is largely a repetition of the overview, which does not add new information or synthesize the data effectively. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the contrary side' and 'however', but they are sometimes used inaccurately or sound mechanical. The referencing is also occasionally unclear. To improve, focus on grouping related information together and using a wider variety of linking words to connect sentences and ideas more naturally.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety expected at higher levels. You rely heavily on basic phrasing such as 'jobs in the four sectors' and 'with the passage of time', which is repeated multiple times throughout the text. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'economical jobs' instead of 'employment figures' or 'jobs in the economy'. To achieve a higher score, try to incorporate more specific vocabulary related to data analysis, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'declined steadily', or 'accounted for'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('in US' instead of 'in the US') and awkward phrasing ('economical jobs'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some run-on sentences and unnecessary spacing. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, and try to vary your sentence structure by using more complex clauses to describe the trends.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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