Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph displays the number of jobs that existed in four distinct sectors of employment, contributing to the economy of US between 1960 and 2020.

In 1960, manufacturing has 15 million jobs. The numbers increased to 20 million in 1980, making it the highest figure on the chart. There was a gradual decline in trend observed for the following years, making the numbers to drop as low as approximately 13 million. Employment in retail was the second largest category providing jobs, with 6 million jobs in 1960. Moreover, the figures witnessed a dramatic rise from 10 million in 1980 to 15 million in 2000. With a slight increment in the following years, it made the final figure close to 16 million in 2020.

Agriculture has the same number of jobs as retail in 1960. However, unlike the trend for retail jobs, the trajectory for agricultural employment drastically decreased, from 6 million in 1960 to less than 4 million by 1980. Moreover, there was a steady decline in the following years, which led to the final figure of 2 million jobs in 2020. Healthcare sector has the least number of jobs in 1960, at just over 2 million. However, with a remarkable increase in its demand, the numbers rose to 5 million in 1980 and over 10 million in 2000, with finally reaching a peak of over 15 million jobs in 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing sector was the largest employment hub in the initial years, which decline considerably by 2020. However, jobs in retail and healthcare experienced a remarkable rise over time, while the exact opposite was observed for agricultural sector.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion7.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

You have successfully identified the main trends and provided a clear overview of the data. You covered all four sectors and made relevant comparisons, such as noting that manufacturing was the largest sector initially while healthcare saw the most significant growth. The data points are generally accurate and support your descriptions well. To reach a higher band, ensure that you consistently use the correct tense for historical data (e.g., 'manufacturing had' instead of 'has') and avoid minor inaccuracies in data reporting, such as the claim that agriculture and retail started at the same level in 1960, when the graph shows a slight difference.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The response is logically organized, with each paragraph focusing on a specific sector or group of sectors. The progression of ideas is clear, and you have used a variety of cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'However', and 'In contrast' to link your points. Paragraphing is used effectively to separate the different trends. To improve, ensure that the transition between sentences is always smooth; occasionally, the phrasing feels slightly mechanical, but the overall structure is sound and easy to follow throughout the report.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey information with precision. Phrases like 'gradual decline in trend', 'dramatic rise', and 'remarkable increase' are appropriate for describing trends in a graph. There are some minor issues with word choice, such as 'slight increment' (which is slightly unnatural in this context) and 'making the numbers to drop' (grammatically incorrect). However, you successfully use a range of topic-specific vocabulary related to economic sectors and data trends, which allows for clear communication of the information provided in the graph.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is good. However, there are several grammatical errors that persist throughout the text. For example, you frequently use the present tense for past events (e.g., 'manufacturing has 15 million jobs' instead of 'had'). There are also minor errors in verb patterns, such as 'making the numbers to drop' instead of 'causing the numbers to drop'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on consistent tense usage and verb complementation will help improve your accuracy.

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