Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given graph shows the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US. The data has been calibrated in numbers.

Overall, the graph of manufacturing and agriculture were decreased over the time period at the other hand the graph of retail and healthcare were increased over the time.

In Year 1960, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector was 15 million it was the most numbers of jobs in that year. retail sector was at 6 million. The data of agriculture sector shows that it was also at 6 million and healthcare sector was at least with just almost only 2 million. In Year 1980, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector was increased it stands on 20 million. Retail sector was also increased it was stands on 10 million. agriculture sector was the only sector who was decreased in that year it was decreased almost half now it was stand on almost 3 million and the data of Healthcare shows that it was increased from 2 million to 5 million.

In year 2000, The Manufacturing sector was decreased and set back at almost 17 million and the data of retail was increased it stands on 15 million this year. the data of agriculture shows that it was almost same as the year 1980 and the data of healthcare sector was increased at almost 11 milloin. In year 2020, manufacturing sector was at almost at 13 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends. However, the overview is slightly underdeveloped, and the reporting of data is inconsistent. For instance, the year 2020 is mentioned but lacks a complete comparison, and the description of the manufacturing sector's peak is inaccurate based on the provided data. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of a clear, comprehensive summary of the overall trends across the entire period limits the score. The response would benefit from more precise data selection and a more cohesive synthesis of the information rather than listing figures year by year.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the chronological structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is mechanical and sometimes repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'the data of' and 'it was'. Transitions between sentences are often abrupt, and the logical progression is hindered by the repetitive structure of the sentences. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the paragraphing could be more effectively used to group related trends rather than just time periods. Improving the variety of linking words would significantly enhance the flow of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There is a heavy reliance on basic verbs like 'increased', 'decreased', and 'shows'. Phrases such as 'the data has been calibrated in numbers' are unnatural in this context. There are also minor spelling errors, such as 'milloin'. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plummeted', 'surged', or 'remained stable', and avoid repeating the same sentence structures and word choices throughout the text.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include incorrect verb tenses ('the graph... were decreased'), missing prepositions, and awkward phrasing ('it stands on 10 million'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with several run-on sentences and incorrect capitalisation (e.g., 'In Year 1960'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage would be a great next step.

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