Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given graph illustrates the number of jobs in four major sectors of the United States economy between the years 1960 - 2020. It also predicts the future jobs by there past performance.
The sector that contributes the most jobs and contributes large part in the economic development was manufacturing. There were about 15 million jobs in this sector in the year 1960 which kept on increasing till the year 1980 by reaching a massive number of 20 million jobs. After 1980, the amount of jobs kept on decreasing and by the year 2020 it reached a number of 13 million jobs.
The two sectors that were on the same level in sence of offering jobs in 1960 were agriculture and retail. But they both showed a completely opposite reaction after 1960. Because the number of jobs in the agriculture sector kept on decreasing by the following 60 years and reaches about 2 million jobs while jobs in retail sector were increasing and by the same period of time it reached about 15.5 million jobs.
Healtcare was the sector that offered a massive contribution in jobs. Because the number of jobs in the health care sector were increasing and by the year 2020 it reached an amount of 15.5 million jobs similar to retail but from a low number of jobs in the year 2960.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the rise and fall of manufacturing and the growth of retail and healthcare. However, the overview is weak; it mentions 'predicts the future jobs,' which is not supported by the data provided, as the graph only covers 1960–2020. Additionally, the description of the data is sometimes inaccurate, such as stating healthcare started from a 'low number' in 1960 when the graph shows it was the lowest of the four. The response would benefit from a more precise summary of the main trends rather than just listing individual sector movements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, each focusing on specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'After 1980' and 'But they both showed,' which help the flow. However, some transitions are mechanical or slightly awkward, such as starting a paragraph with 'Healtcare was the sector that offered a massive contribution... Because the number of jobs...'. The use of 'Because' at the start of sentences is grammatically incorrect and disrupts the logical flow. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, but the cohesion could be more sophisticated.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to describe trends (e.g., 'increasing', 'decreasing', 'massive contribution'). However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and spelling errors, such as 'sence' instead of 'sense' and 'Healtcare' instead of 'Healthcare'. The phrase 'opposite reaction' is slightly unnatural in this context; 'divergent trends' would be more appropriate. While the range is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('the number of jobs... were increasing') and incorrect sentence fragments starting with 'Because'. Punctuation is generally functional, but the misuse of '2960' instead of '1960' is a distracting error. While the meaning is usually clear, the frequency of these minor errors prevents the response from reaching a higher band. More attention to verb tenses and pluralisation is needed.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.