Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the detailed overview of the number of jobs in four industries of the economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.

Overall, it has been clearly observed that manufacturing jobs are popular in the America. Whereas the least popular among the US job is agriculture in [redacted phone].

In 1960, Manufacturing field started at 15 million. The highest and the peak of this job opportunities were in 1980 with 20 million jobs available in US, however the sharp decline was observed over the period of time with less than 15 million in 2020. The agriculture jobs in 1960 were around 6 million than a steady fall was observed in 1980 with less than 5 million and in following years there were less fluctuation in agriculture field with around 2 to 3 million in 2020.

The retail started with estimation of 6 million in 1980 and over the years there has been drastic up

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to complete the task as it cuts off mid-sentence at the end. While you identify some main features, such as the peak of manufacturing in 1980 and the general decline of agriculture, the analysis is incomplete. You have not provided a full overview of all four sectors, and the abrupt ending prevents a comprehensive summary. To improve, ensure you cover all data points presented in the graph and provide a clear, balanced comparison of the trends across the entire period. The current response is too fragmented to fully address the requirements of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by the incomplete nature of the final paragraph. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Overall' and 'In 1960', but the flow is somewhat mechanical. The referencing is occasionally unclear, and the lack of a concluding summary or a complete final paragraph makes the overall structure feel disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words to connect your sentences more naturally and ensure that each paragraph is fully developed before moving to the next.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'popular' and 'field', which are not ideal for describing economic sectors or statistical trends. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'estimation of 6 million' and 'less fluctuation'. To improve, try to incorporate more academic vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuation', 'proportion', or 'downward trend', and ensure you use words that accurately reflect the context of economic data.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains several grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. For example, 'the least popular among the US job is agriculture' is grammatically incorrect, and 'there were less fluctuation' should be 'there was less fluctuation'. You use mostly simple sentence structures, and the attempt at a complex sentence at the end is incomplete. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles. Aim to incorporate a wider range of complex structures, such as relative clauses or passive voice, while ensuring that your basic sentence construction remains accurate.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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