Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the amount of jobs in manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare from 1960 to 2020 in the US economy.
Overall, the manufacturing always topped the chart in number of jobs, albeit drop in last year, in addition, retail and healthcare ended in the same projection at the end, however, agriculture had given the least number of jobs in all years.
At the beginning of the period, the two sectors was Retail and Healthcare. In 1960, Healthcare started with 3 million jobs and Retail with 6 million jobs, moreover, they both gradually increase from 1960 and they both remain constant and ended up given 16 million jobs in 2020.
Getting into further details, it can be seen clearly that the most jobs had been provided in manufacturing from 1960 to 2000 with 15, 20 and 17 millions jobs respectively. therefore, in 2020 the offer drops. Nevertheless, in year 1960 agriculture gives the same jobs as retail but it swiftly dropped in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers the main features of the graph, including the trends for the four sectors. However, the data reporting is inconsistent and occasionally inaccurate. For instance, you state that manufacturing provided 15, 20, and 17 million jobs in 1960, 2000, and 2020, which does not align with typical graph interpretations. Furthermore, the claim that agriculture gave the same number of jobs as retail in 1960 is factually incorrect based on the provided data. While you identify the main trends, the lack of precision in reporting figures and the misinterpretation of the data points prevent a higher score. To improve, ensure that you carefully cross-reference the axes with the data points before writing.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused. For example, 'in addition' and 'however' are used in the overview in a way that disrupts the flow of the sentence. Additionally, the transition 'Getting into further details' is a bit informal for an Academic Task 1 response. While there is an overall progression, the logical links between sentences are sometimes weak, and the referencing (e.g., 'the two sectors was Retail and Healthcare') is occasionally unclear or grammatically incorrect.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic verbs like 'topped', 'started', and 'gives'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'ended in the same projection' and 'the offer drops'. These errors do not impede communication, but they demonstrate a limited control over academic register. To improve, try to incorporate more precise terminology for describing trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a sharp decline'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Subject-verb agreement issues are common, such as 'the two sectors was Retail and Healthcare' and 'agriculture gives the same jobs'. There are also issues with tense consistency, such as 'agriculture had given the least number of jobs' when referring to a historical trend. While the meaning is generally clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and punctuation limit the score. Focusing on proofreading for subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage would significantly improve your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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