Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph trache the information about the number of jobs in four sector of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that, job of manufacturing was recorded highest among the figure, whereas, lowest number of jobs was reported observed in the agricultural sector.

To begin with, in 1960, the number of jobs in the manufacturing sector was the highest, at around 15 millions. After this, it decline marginally from 1980 to 2020 and reached approximately 13 million. Moreover, jobs of retail sector was recorded 6 million in 1960 and this figure rise sharply and reached near about 15 millions in 2000.

Furthermore, jobs of healthcare sector was 3 million in 1960. After the rise steadily it stood at 5 million in 1980. and After this it show gradual increase climbing 5 million to 16 million over the fourty years. Moreover, 6 millions jobs in of Agriculture sector in 1960 and it decrease steedly and reached 3 millions in 1980. After this, it was remain stable in upto 2000.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview of the main trends. However, there are inaccuracies in the data reporting. For example, you state that manufacturing was the 'highest' in 1960 at 15 million, but the graph shows it starting at roughly 17 million. Additionally, the description of the agricultural sector is slightly confusing, as you mention it reached 3 million in 1980 and remained stable, whereas the graph shows a continued decline. While the main features are identified, the lack of precision in data interpretation prevents a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'Furthermore' to link ideas. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical, and the flow between sentences is occasionally interrupted by grammatical errors. For instance, the transition 'and After this it show' is awkward and disrupts the logical progression of the text. Better control over referencing and punctuation would improve the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'marginally', 'gradual increase', and 'stable'. However, there are several word-choice errors and awkward phrasings, such as 'trache the information' (instead of 'tracks' or 'illustrates') and 'jobs of retail sector' (instead of 'jobs in the retail sector'). Some spelling errors, such as 'steedly' and 'fourty', also occur. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and sophistication required for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('it decline', 'it show', 'it was remain') and article usage ('the number of jobs in four sector'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary periods used mid-sentence, such as '1980. and After this'. These errors are noticeable and occasionally impede the reader's flow, though the meaning remains generally clear throughout the report.

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