Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph presents number of jobs in various sectors of the economy in 1960 and 2005 in the US.

Over the period, the job sectors have witnessed dramatic changes. Job market in retail and healthcare sector had experienced a hike, while there is a considerable decline in the jobs related to manufacturing and agriculture departments.

To begin with, jobs in the healthcare sector has been a boom to the economy. It rose to 5 million in 1980 and increased significantly while reaching its peek at 15 million in the year 2020. Additionally, jobs in retail sector also increased dramatically from 5 million initially to 15 million in 2000 and then became steady in a decade time.

On the contrary, employments in Agriculture sector declined from 5 million in the year 1960 to 3 million approximately in 1980, then became steady for a while and fallen down to 2 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the upward trends in healthcare and retail and the downward trends in agriculture and manufacturing. However, the task achievement is limited by inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the prompt covers 1960–2020, but the introduction incorrectly states the period as 1960–2005. Furthermore, the description of the manufacturing sector is omitted despite being a key feature of the graph. While the main trends are identified, the failure to address all sectors and the misstatement of the timeframe prevent a higher score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction followed by body paragraphs focusing on growth and decline. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To begin with', 'Additionally', and 'On the contrary', which help guide the reader. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes mechanical. The referencing is generally clear, though the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs could be smoother. The structure is sufficient to follow the writer's argument, but the lack of a clear concluding summary or a more cohesive synthesis of the data keeps this at a mid-range level.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with attempts to use descriptive terms like 'dramatic changes', 'hike', and 'considerable decline'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'has been a boom to the economy' (which is grammatically awkward in this context) and 'in a decade time' (should be 'in a decade's time'). The word 'peek' is a spelling error for 'peak'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors that occur throughout the text, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('jobs in the healthcare sector has been', 'employments in Agriculture sector declined'), and missing articles ('presents number of jobs'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. The control of tense is generally consistent, but the overall grammatical accuracy is inconsistent, preventing the response from reaching a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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