Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this graph, there is the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the United States.
In this graph there is the four sectors in which Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture and Healthcare are present from the year 1960 to 2020. The jobs are present in the Millions which is started from 0 to 25 Millions.
In which there is the information of jobs started from Manufacturing and which is 15 Million in the 1960 and then in 1980 the jobs of manufacturing is 20 Millions, then in 2000 the job is 17 Millions and then later in 2020 the job of manufacturing is 13.5 Millions.
In the retail sector, the number of jobs is started from 6 million in 1960 and then in 1980, the jobs is increased and they was present at 10 millions and then later in 2000 the job is 15 millions and at the end of 2020 the job is 16 millions.
In the agricultural sector, the job is started from 6 million in 1960, and then they move downwards and were present on 3 million in 1980 and after later in 2000 it remains same but in later 2020 they also move downs and present at 2.5 Millions.
In the last sector, healthcare sector stated from 2.3 million jobs in 1960, and then they move upwards on 5 millions in 1980 and then also move more upwards on 11 millions in 2000 and then later in 2020 they are present at 16 millions.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers all four sectors and provides data for the requested years. However, it lacks a clear overview of the main trends, which is a requirement for a high band score in Task 1. The report is essentially a list of data points for each sector rather than a synthesis of the information. To improve, you should group the sectors by their trends (e.g., those that increased versus those that declined) and provide a summary paragraph that highlights the most significant changes, such as the dramatic rise in healthcare jobs compared to the decline in agriculture.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organised into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the progression of ideas is mechanical and repetitive. Each paragraph begins with a similar structure, such as 'In the [sector] sector, the number of jobs is started from...'. There is a lack of cohesive devices to link ideas within and between sentences. The use of referencing is also weak, with repetitive phrasing like 'the job is' or 'they are present at'. Improving the use of transition words and varying sentence structures would significantly enhance the flow of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. You frequently use the same phrases, such as 'the job is' or 'present at', to describe the data. There is little attempt to use a range of vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'experienced a steady decline', or 'surpassed'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety and the misuse of word forms (e.g., 'the jobs is increased') limit the score. Expanding your repertoire of trend-related verbs and nouns is essential for a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the jobs is increased', 'they was present') and article usage. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and there is a lack of complex sentences. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent and noticeable. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and try to incorporate more complex structures, such as relative clauses or participial phrases, to describe the data more fluidly.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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