Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

sectors of economy.

1: Manufacturing

2: Retail

3: Agriculture

4: Health care

As mentioned in the graph the economy of the united states of America gave million of jobs from year 1960 to year 2020. Below I'll mention the jobs number according to graph one by one.

1. Manufacturing: According to graph from year 1960 to 1980 jobs market touched its all time high with job's reaching 20 million. Then from year 1980 to 2000 jobs graph retraced down to around 16 to 17 million. And by the year 2020 the job market wen below 15 million.

2. Retail: Now let's discuss the jobs situation in retail Market. From year 1960 to 1980 the Total jobs according to given graph is approximately 10 million. then the retail industry showed significant improvement and until year 2000 retail job market touched 15 million mark. And then it stabilized that number until 2020 which is approximately between 15 to 17 million jobs.

3. Agriculture: The next sector is agriculture. In year 1960 this sector job market was quite goof but with the passage of time until 1980 it came down around 3 to 4 million and kept that number of jobs stable until year 2000. And eventually until 2020 it remains between 1 to 5 million.

4. Health care : This sector of us economy showed significant improvement by the passage of time. From year 1960 to 1980 it touched the 5 million jobs mark. With the passage of time until year 2000 it reached around 10 million. And by the year 2020, The United States health care job economy hit 15 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the requirements of an Academic Task 1 report. Instead of providing an analytical summary with an overview of trends, the student presents a list-like structure that describes each sector in isolation. There is no attempt to compare the sectors or identify the most significant features of the graph. The introduction is informal and does not provide a clear summary of the overall trends. To improve, you must group information logically, highlight key similarities and differences, and provide a clear overview paragraph that captures the main trends across the 60-year period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is organized into a list format rather than a cohesive essay. While there is some logical progression within each numbered point, the lack of an introduction, a clear overview, and a concluding summary makes the text feel disjointed. Cohesive devices are largely absent or used in a very mechanical way, such as 'The next sector is...'. Paragraphing is not used effectively, as the response relies on a numbered list which is inappropriate for an IELTS report. You should use linking words and transition phrases to connect ideas across paragraphs.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. Phrases like 'touched its all time high', 'retraced down', and 'showed significant improvement' are used repeatedly. There are also errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'goof' instead of 'good' and 'wen' instead of 'went'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to convey precise information about trends or data points. To achieve a higher band, you should incorporate more varied and precise vocabulary related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', 'declined gradually', or 'remained stable'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors, including issues with article usage ('the united states of America'), subject-verb agreement, and tense consistency. Sentence structures are generally simple and repetitive, with little attempt at complex sentences. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with capitalization and the use of commas. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors and the lack of structural variety limit the score. Focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like missing articles and incorrect verb forms.

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