Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given line graph illustrates that the workers of diffrent feilds grows in U.S for four decades from 1960 to 2020. The data has been calibrated in Millions.
Overall, it can be said that the highest proportion of jobs was in manufacture sector in 1980 while the lowest proportion was in agriculture sector in 2020.
After analysing the graph, it can be clearly seen that the Heathcare centres jobs had a steady increase which was started from 2 million jobs to 16 million jobs approximately. Moreover, employment in Heathcare and retail was same in the year 2020 which was around 16 million jobs. Adding more to it, retail career and agriculture career was same in 1960 nevertheless the retail jobs dramatically went up whereas the agriculture jobs minimally dropped. Furthermore, the manufacture jobs reached at a high of 20 million and with increasing years it sharply decreased at 13 Million jobs approximately .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors mentioned in the graph and identifies key trends. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, it claims the highest proportion of jobs was in manufacturing in 1980, but the graph shows manufacturing peaking earlier and healthcare/retail overtaking it later. The summary of trends is generally clear, but some comparisons are imprecise, such as stating retail and agriculture were the same in 1960, which is not clearly supported by the visual data. To improve, ensure that the overview captures the most significant trends rather than specific data points, and double-check the accuracy of your comparisons against the graph.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'Adding more to it', and 'Furthermore' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical or repetitive. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the internal structure of the body paragraphs could be improved by grouping the sectors more logically (e.g., those that increased vs. those that decreased) rather than jumping between them. Referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences could be smoother to enhance the overall readability.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there are several spelling errors, such as 'diffrent' (different), 'feilds' (fields), and 'Heathcare' (Healthcare). The range of vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, relying on basic terms like 'jobs' and 'career'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of variety in reporting verbs and descriptive adjectives prevents the response from reaching a higher band. To improve, focus on using more precise academic vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'plateaued', or 'surpassed', and ensure careful proofreading to eliminate basic spelling mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. Examples include 'the workers of diffrent feilds grows' (should be 'the number of workers in different fields grew') and 'which was started from' (should be 'which started at'). There are also issues with article usage and prepositional phrases, such as 'reached at a high of'. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to lower the score. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage will significantly improve the quality of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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