Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The graph illustrates the number of jobs in different sectors in the US over 60 year time period, from 1960 to 200.

Overall, the job market for retail and healthcare has increased over the 60 years, while the job market for manufacturing and agriculture decreased in the same time period.

In 1960, the job market for manufacturing was the biggest amongst all the job markets in the graph at 15 million jobs with reaching it's peak in 1980 at 20 million jobs, however, over the next 40 years the market started to drop eventually reach 13 million jobs by 2020. Meanwhile, healthcare was had the lowest number of jobs in 1960 at just 2 million jobs, by 1980 the job market for healthcare grew to 5 million jobs and had a upwards trajectory for the next 40 years and reaching 16 million jobs by 2020.

Retail and agriculture had the same number of jobs in 1960 at 6 millions jobs, retail jobs grew to the same number of jobs in 2020 as healthcare at 16 million jobs, while agriculture halved over the 60 years to 2.5 million jobs in the US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends effectively. You have successfully highlighted the key features, such as the growth in retail and healthcare versus the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the data. However, there is a minor factual error in the introduction where you state the period ends in '200' instead of 2020. Additionally, while you make comparisons, some of the data points could be more precisely linked to the years to ensure full clarity. Overall, the response is well-structured and addresses the prompt requirements adequately.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized, with a clear introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs that group the sectors by their trends (growth vs. decline). You use cohesive devices such as 'meanwhile', 'however', and 'in the same time period' to connect ideas. However, the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking phrases to avoid repetitive sentence structures. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the specific data analysis. The progression of ideas is generally smooth, making the information easy to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upwards trajectory', 'halved', and 'job market'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'healthcare was had' and 'at 6 millions jobs' (should be 'million'). While you successfully convey the meaning, the vocabulary is somewhat functional rather than sophisticated. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and ensure consistent accuracy with pluralization and verb usage.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical slips, such as 'reaching it's peak' (should be 'its'), 'healthcare was had', and the typo in the date '200'. These errors do not impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. You have a good grasp of basic sentence construction, but more attention to subject-verb agreement and punctuation (specifically possessives) would improve the accuracy of your writing significantly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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