Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The graph provides us the information about the number of job vacancies available in four different economical fields in united states between 60 years.

Overall, jobs in manufacturing industries increases in start but after twenty years, there is a rapid decline in it. The number retail jobs go on constant increase with the passage of time. There are not many agriculture jobs available from the start of the graph. In addition, the available jobs in agricultural field were also on decline decreased. The healthcare worker increases with time equal to retail jobs.

Manufacturing industries have 15 million jobs in1960. After that, their job ratios goes on increase till 1980 and then constantly declined at the end of 2020. Retail industries in 1960, has more than 5million jobs which increases with time and in year 2020, there were approximately 15 million jobs. There are not many agricultural jobs available in US even in the past as compared to other industries. In year 1960, there were more than five million jobs but they were on bit decline till the year 2020. Healthcare jobs in past such as, in 1960 were less than three million but with the passage of time, they is a rapid increase and in year 2020, there were approximately 15 million healthcare jobs in United States.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the rise in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, the overview is somewhat weak and lacks a clear synthesis of the data. While the main features are reported, some descriptions are imprecise, such as stating 'jobs in manufacturing industries increases in start' without specifying the timeframe. The data points are generally accurate, but the analysis could be more sophisticated by grouping the sectors more effectively to highlight the contrast between the growing service-based sectors and the declining industrial/agricultural ones.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent use of 'in 1960' or 'with the passage of time' to start sentences. The progression of ideas is logical, but the transitions between sentences could be smoother. Referencing is sometimes unclear, for example, 'they is a rapid increase' lacks a clear subject reference. Overall, the paragraphing is sufficient, but the flow between sentences needs more variety to achieve a higher band.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks range and precision. There is a reliance on basic terms like 'increase', 'decline', and 'jobs'. While the student attempts to use some topic-specific vocabulary, there are errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'economical fields' instead of 'economic sectors' and 'job ratios' when referring to raw numbers. Spelling is generally accurate, but the lack of sophisticated vocabulary limits the score. To improve, the student should incorporate more varied synonyms for trends and industry-specific terminology.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('jobs... increases', 'they is a rapid increase') and awkward phrasing ('their job ratios goes on increase'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after numbers ('15 million jobs in1960'). While the meaning is generally understandable, the high frequency of basic grammatical errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement would significantly improve the quality of the writing.

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