Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The below graph illustrate the information about the numbers of jobd in four sectors of US economy between 1960 to 2020.
The graph illustrate the four vital economy sectore Manufacturing , Retail, Agriculture and last but the least Healthcare sector.Also the graph represent the job section in millions. starting from Manufacturing in 1960 the jobs 15m and extended straght to the 20 million but then from 1980 this progress strated decering till 2020.and the other-hand the retail busniess shows the countinue progress and from 5million to stright 15M and ended at 16M in 2020.where as Agriculture ecomony going down from 5M to graduly 1980 and then 2020.US Healthcare sector improved from 1960 to 1980 and then graduly going upwards straght to the retail sector in 2020.
if we compare over all economy then in 1980 manufacturing scetor is doing great where as other sectors are retail and healthcare are flowling the same path.but the Agriculture sector is very low as compare to others .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the task by identifying the four sectors and describing the trends. However, the overview is weak; it lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends, such as the overall growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. The data reporting is sometimes imprecise, with phrases like 'extended straight to the 20 million' and 'going down from 5M to gradually 1980' lacking clarity. While the main features are identified, the lack of a cohesive overview and the somewhat disjointed presentation of data points prevent this from reaching a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the internal structure is problematic. The progression of ideas is often confusing, particularly in the second paragraph where data points are listed without clear logical flow. Cohesive devices are used, but they are often mechanical or misused, such as 'and the other-hand' and 'last but the least'. The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the comparison between the sectors. Paragraphing is present but does not effectively separate the introduction, overview, and body details.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with frequent spelling errors such as 'illustrate' (should be 'illustrates'), 'jobd', 'sectore', 'straght', 'decering', 'busniess', and 'flowling'. These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to describe trends accurately; for example, using 'going down' or 'improved' repeatedly instead of more precise academic terms like 'declined', 'plummeted', or 'experienced growth'. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or collocations appropriate for an academic report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that affect readability. Subject-verb agreement is inconsistent, such as 'The below graph illustrate' and 'the graph represent'. Punctuation is poor, with missing spaces after periods and incorrect capitalization. Sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often faulty or lack necessary conjunctions. For instance, 'starting from Manufacturing in 1960 the jobs 15m' is a fragmented, ungrammatical construction. The high frequency of errors in basic sentence structure and punctuation significantly impacts the clarity of the report.
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