Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graphs illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the multe line charts shows the number of jobs in US in four sectors (manufacturing, Retail, agriculture, and Healthcare with observation the highest figure of increasing the jobs in Healthcare sector in the time periods while, the lowest was Agriculture sector in all sectors.
In 1960, the number of jobs in manufacturing sector was the highest figure, 15 millions jobs where as this figure decrease gradually up to 20 millions in 1980 but After that the figure decrease gradually upto 13 millions in 2020. In addition the agriculture sector are the same figure was about 5 millions and this figure decrease deline dramatically up to 3 millions in 2020.
Furthermore, Retail and Healthcare are started with lowest figure
about 5 millions and 2 millions
pt increase dramatically
over the periods and
reached up to 16 millions
in 2020 where these
sectors are having highest
achievements in jobs sectors
as compared to otherone.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for the four sectors. However, the data reporting is inaccurate and confusing. For instance, you state the manufacturing sector reached 20 million in 1980, which is not supported by the graph, and the description of the agriculture sector is unclear. The overview is present but lacks clarity due to grammatical errors. To improve, ensure that the data points cited are accurate and that the summary highlights the most significant trends, such as the clear shift from manufacturing to service-based sectors like healthcare and retail, rather than listing figures that are difficult to follow.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps the overall structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'where as' and 'in addition'. The progression of ideas is hindered by the fragmented sentences in the final paragraph, which makes the text difficult to read. The referencing is also inconsistent, making it hard to follow the comparison between the sectors. To improve, use linking words more naturally and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus, avoiding the broken sentence structure seen at the end of the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is limited and repetitive, with frequent errors in word choice and collocation. For example, 'multe line charts' is incorrect, and 'highest achievements in jobs sectors' is an unnatural way to describe employment figures. There are also spelling errors such as 'deline' and 'pt'. To reach a higher band, you should focus on using more precise terminology related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'declined', and ensure that your word choices are appropriate for an academic report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('the line graphs illustrates', 'agriculture sector are'), incorrect verb tenses, and sentence fragments. The structure of the final paragraph is particularly problematic, as it is broken into short, disjointed lines that lack proper punctuation and grammatical cohesion. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject and verb, and practice using complex structures only when you are confident in their accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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