Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrates information four employment sectors regarding US economy from 1960 to 2010.Overall, it is clear that manufacturing company gradually decreased and from others two were growing at highest point.
In 1960, manufacturing company accounted 15 million shares in job market and then surged to reach 20 million in just 20 years gap. After that constantly decreased up to nearly 13 million in 2010. For retail and healthcare, both were standing at around 6 million and 2 million respectively in 1960, which less than half of the manufacturing sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the ability to fully address the task. The summary is incomplete; it only covers the manufacturing, retail, and healthcare sectors, completely omitting the fourth sector shown in the graph. Furthermore, the analysis lacks a clear overview of the trends for all categories, and the data points mentioned are not fully developed. Because the response is significantly under-length and fails to report on all features of the graph, it does not provide a sufficient summary of the information provided.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is very brief, making it difficult to assess the use of cohesive devices or paragraphing. While there is a basic attempt at an introduction and a body paragraph, the logical progression is hindered by the lack of content. The use of linking words is minimal, and the transition between the overview and the specific data is abrupt. To improve, you should ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and that you use a wider range of cohesive devices to connect your ideas more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are inaccuracies in word choice, such as using 'shares' to refer to the number of jobs, and 'manufacturing company' instead of 'manufacturing sector'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to demonstrate the flexibility required for higher bands. To improve, you should focus on using more precise terminology related to data description, such as 'fluctuated', 'peaked', or 'remained stable', and ensure that your word choices are contextually appropriate for an academic report.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with article usage ('the US economy'), missing prepositions ('accounted for'), and awkward phrasing ('in just 20 years gap'). The sentence structures are relatively simple, and there is a lack of complex grammatical forms. To achieve a higher score, you need to demonstrate a wider range of sentence structures and improve your accuracy with basic grammar, such as subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles and prepositions.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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