Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph present the data about the numbers of employment in ( manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) sectors of the economy in the US form 1960 to 2020.
Overall, over the period of time healthcare and retail sectors have secure more jobs than manufacturing and agriculture sector. The jobs in healthcare sector have a increasing trend form the beginning of the period.
At the beginning of the period, in the healthcare sector the jobs were only 2 million but at the end of the period the jobs were largely increase form 2million to 15million. In retail sector also there was a increasing trend the jobs were goes form about 6 million to more than 15 million which is also greatly increase.
Both manufacturing and retail sector faced downward trend, in manufacturing sector the jobs were highest at 1960 but in 2020 the number of job decrease from 15 million to about 13 million. The jobs in agriculture sector were 6 million at the beginning of the period but at the end of the period there were only 2 million job in this sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies the main trends, such as the growth in healthcare and the decline in agriculture. However, the analysis is slightly inaccurate in places; for example, the text states that the manufacturing sector faced a downward trend, yet the data provided in the text describes a decrease from 15 to 13 million, which is correct, but the grouping of manufacturing with retail as both facing a downward trend is factually incorrect based on the graph, as retail shows a clear upward trend. The overview is present but could be more effectively synthesised to highlight the most significant shifts rather than just listing trends.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organised into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'At the beginning of the period' and 'In retail sector also', though some transitions feel mechanical or repetitive. The progression of ideas is generally clear, but the referencing is occasionally imprecise, such as when the text refers to 'both manufacturing and retail' as having a downward trend, which confuses the reader because the data for retail contradicts this. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different sectors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks sophistication. There is frequent repetition of basic verbs like 'increase' and 'decrease'. Some collocations are awkward, such as 'secure more jobs' instead of 'accounted for more jobs' or 'held more jobs'. There are also minor errors in word choice, such as 'largely increase' instead of 'increased significantly'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points, it does not demonstrate the flexibility or precision required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('the line graph present', 'jobs were goes'), missing articles ('in healthcare sector'), and incorrect preposition usage ('form 1960 to 2020'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable and detract from the overall fluency of the writing. More attention to basic tense consistency and article usage is needed.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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