Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy, namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare, in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that retail and healthcare occupation increased rapidly thought the period and become considerably same and more popular than other jobs. In addition, manufacturing slightly rose in the beginning and gradually declined over the period of time, alternatively, agriculture also fell down thought the period of time.

Looking first at retail work begin with around in 7 million in 1960 this figure the rose consistently, reaching 15 million in 2000 and rise gradually, to around 17 million at end of period.

By comparison, manufacture job followed a upward trend at the beginning in 1980, after that trend it declined dramatically thought the period and reach around 13 million in 2020. While agriculture begin with around 7 million then fell down, reach 4 million in 1980, after fell down it remain stable for a while in 2000, end with the 3 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, stating that retail and healthcare became 'considerably same' is vague and not fully supported by the data. Additionally, some data points are misread or poorly described, such as the claim that manufacturing followed an upward trend in 1980, which contradicts the graph. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of precision in reporting figures and the misinterpretation of trends prevent this from reaching a higher band. The response would benefit from more careful data extraction and a clearer summary of the overall patterns.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'Looking first at retail work begin with' and 'after fell down it remain stable' demonstrate a lack of smooth transitions between ideas. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the logical progression is occasionally hindered by awkward phrasing. While there is an attempt to use linking words, they are not always used effectively to connect sentences or clauses, leading to a somewhat disjointed flow. Improved control over cohesive devices and sentence structure would enhance the overall coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary range is adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. There are several instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'retail and healthcare occupation increased' (should be 'employment' or 'number of jobs') and 'considerably same'. The student relies on basic descriptors like 'rose', 'fell', and 'declined'. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of more sophisticated or varied vocabulary limits the score. To improve, the student should focus on using more precise terminology related to trends and economic sectors, and ensure that word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and some attempted complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('retail and healthcare occupation increased'), incorrect verb tenses ('agriculture begin with'), and missing articles or prepositions ('at end of period'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be distracting. The student needs to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring that verbs are correctly conjugated and that sentence boundaries are clearly marked to improve the overall accuracy of the writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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