Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given diagram illustrates, How's the number of jobs changes in four sectors of the economy in US between 1960 to 2020.

At first, Agriculture sector rise in 1960 but after that it's remain same in every year until 2020. However, Manufacturing sector is upwards in 1980 but in 2020 it is also looking downward. On the other hand, Retail sector is continues bullish during 1960 to 2020. Moreover, Healthcare sector is neutral until 1980 but suddenly we look a great pump in it.

Overall, There is four sectors in USA in which we the analyse all the sectors. Manufacturing is very successful sector during 1960 to 2020. Agriculture sector is the bearish sector in in graph because after 1960 it's remain same until 2020. Retail sector is thriving after 1960 and remain rising until 2000 after that it's normal. Healthcare sector set a pump in 1980 and after that it is proceeds rising up to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the four sectors, but the analysis is superficial and lacks precision. The student uses inaccurate terminology like 'bullish', 'bearish', and 'pump', which are not appropriate for describing statistical data in an academic report. Furthermore, the description of the trends is vague; for instance, stating the agriculture sector 'remains same' ignores the actual data points, and the overview is repetitive rather than synthesizing the main trends. The response fails to make meaningful comparisons between the sectors, which is a key requirement for Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or misused, such as 'At first' to introduce a trend or 'Overall' to start a paragraph that simply repeats information. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the flow between sentences is disjointed. The structure lacks a clear, analytical approach, making it difficult for the reader to follow the development of the information provided in the graph.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is significantly limited and often inappropriate for an academic context. The student relies on financial market jargon ('bullish', 'bearish', 'pump') rather than using standard vocabulary for describing trends (e.g., 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'experienced a sharp increase'). There are also errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'proceeds rising up'. The range is insufficient to convey the information with the necessary precision required for an Academic Task 1 response.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('Agriculture sector rise', 'it's remain same'), incorrect tense usage, and awkward sentence construction ('How's the number of jobs changes'). The range of structures is limited, consisting mostly of simple sentences with basic errors. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and capitalization. The lack of control over basic sentence structure prevents the response from reaching a higher band.

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