Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line chart compares number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. Different years are on X-axis. Whereas, Y-axis have number of jobs in millions.

Overall, it can be observed that manufacturing sector had the the highest number of jobs in 1980. However, in the same year agriculture had least opportunities.

Furthermore, healthcare sector had rose the jobs in their sector from around 2.5 millions to a little above 15 millions in 2020. Moreover retail sector had also similar trend and climbed up to same number from roughly around 5.3 millions jobs in 1960.

To sum up, manufacturing was at its peak in 1980 but it had a downfall in the jobs and was at the third position in the chart with approximately 12.5 millions jobs in 2020. In the same time period healthcare sector had a good bump in their jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, identifying the trends for all four sectors. However, the analysis is somewhat superficial. For instance, while you mention the peak of the manufacturing sector in 1980, you fail to provide specific data points for the start or end periods for all sectors, which is necessary for a comprehensive summary. The overview is present but lacks a clear synthesis of the most significant trends. To improve, ensure you provide a more detailed comparison of the data points across the entire time frame rather than focusing only on specific years.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', 'To sum up'). The logical progression between sentences is occasionally disjointed, particularly in the transition between the introduction and the body paragraphs. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the final paragraph where 'In the same time period' is used loosely. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus would enhance the flow of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks precision and variety. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'had rose the jobs' (which is grammatically incorrect) and 'good bump'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'had least opportunities' instead of 'had the fewest job opportunities'. To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more academic collocations and precise terminology related to trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', or 'experienced a significant decline'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'compares number of jobs' (missing article), 'Y-axis have number of jobs' (subject-verb agreement), and 'healthcare sector had rose the jobs' (incorrect verb tense and structure). While you attempt some complex sentence structures, they are often marred by these errors. To improve, focus on basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement, the correct use of articles, and consistent verb tenses when describing past data.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.