Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line chart compares the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020. The different years are on the X-axis. The Y-axis shows the number of jobs in millions.

Overall, it can be observed that the manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs in 1980. However, in the same year agriculture had the least opportunities.

Furthermore, the healthcare sector increased in their sector from around 2.5 million to a little above 15 million in 2020. Moreover the retail sector also had a similar trend and climbed up to same number from roughly around 5.3 million jobs in 1960.

To sum up, manufacturing was at its peak in 1980 but it had a decline in the jobs and was at the third position in the chart with approximately 12.5 million jobs in 2020. In the same time period the healthcare sector had a significant increase in their jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers the main features of the graph, but it lacks a comprehensive overview. While you identified the peak of manufacturing and the growth of healthcare, you failed to mention the agriculture sector's trend or provide a clear summary of the overall shifts between 1960 and 2020. The data selection is somewhat selective; for instance, focusing heavily on 1980 is less effective than describing the broader trends across the 60-year period. To improve, ensure you highlight the most significant changes and comparisons across the entire timeframe rather than focusing on isolated years.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'Moreover', 'To sum up'). The progression of ideas is occasionally disjointed, particularly in the final paragraph where the transition between manufacturing and healthcare feels abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, unified focus would enhance the logical flow of the response.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and variety required for a higher band. You rely on basic descriptors like 'increased', 'climbed up', and 'decline'. There is also a slight misuse of terminology, such as 'increased in their sector', which is not idiomatic. To reach a higher band, incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends, such as 'surged', 'fluctuated', or 'experienced a downward trend', and ensure collocations are used accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, which is a positive start. However, there are several grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader, such as 'healthcare sector increased in their sector' and 'in the same time period'. Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor issues with sentence construction. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement and ensure that your complex sentences are constructed accurately without unnecessary wordiness.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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