Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the information about the number of job opportunities in four sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is clear that among the four sectors, Agriculture was the only sector in which job opportunities decreased and remained the lowest sector of jobs until 2020. Whereas the Retail, Manufacturing, and Healthcare sectors changed their pattern from 1960 to 2020.

From 1960 to 1980, Manufacturing was the largest sector in terms of jobs; it reflected the upward trend. Similarly, in the initial period, the agriculture sector offered job opportunities; after 1980, it showed a gradual decline until 2020.

The retail sector showed a gradual upward trend, and in 2000 to 2020 it showed a constant trend towards job opportunities. Similarly, the healthcare sector also attributed upward pattern until 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While you have identified the main trends, the analysis is superficial. You mention that Manufacturing was the largest sector but fail to provide specific data points or comparative figures to support this. Furthermore, the description of the trends is somewhat vague; for instance, stating that the retail sector showed a 'constant trend' is inaccurate based on the graph. To improve, you must include more specific data (years and numbers) and ensure that all parts of the prompt are fully developed to reach the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which is a positive step. However, the logical progression is hindered by the lack of detail. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical, such as the repetitive use of 'Similarly' to start sentences. The referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly when discussing the 'initial period' without specifying the exact timeframe. To improve, try to use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, moving from a general overview to specific, data-supported comparisons between the sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic descriptors like 'upward trend' and 'gradual decline'. There is an attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary, but it is limited. Phrases like 'attributed upward pattern' are not idiomatic and suggest a lack of control over collocation. To improve, focus on using more varied verbs and nouns to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'surpassed', or 'remained stagnant', and ensure that your word choices are contextually appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical inaccuracies. For example, 'the healthcare sector also attributed upward pattern' is grammatically incorrect and lacks a preposition. Additionally, 'it reflected the upward trend' is slightly awkward in this context. There are also minor issues with article usage and sentence construction. To improve, focus on ensuring subject-verb agreement and using prepositions correctly when describing data trends. Aim for more complex sentence structures while maintaining accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.