Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph illustrates the changes in employment across four economic sectors in the United States Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare, from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Healthcare and Retail experienced consistent upward trajectories throughout the 60-years. Healthcare exhibiting the most dramatic rise. Conversely, Manufacturing saw initial growth before 1980 and after that steady decline, While Agriculture remained the smallest employer with slight downward drift.

In 1960, Manufacturing was by far the largest provider of jobs at 15 million, peaking at 20 million in 1980. However, this sector dropped to 17 million in 2000 and in 2020 it felt to 13 million. In Retail it started at 5 million in 1960 and climbed to 15 million over the decades, overtaking Manufacturing around 2015 by the end of timeframe.

Healthcare began as the smallest sector in 1960 alongside the Agriculture offered only 2 million jobs. Over the 6 decades, matching Manufacturing at 14 million jobs and 16 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the overall trends and specific data points for the four sectors. You successfully identified the main shifts, such as the rise of Healthcare and the decline of Manufacturing. However, the report could be improved by ensuring the data points are more precise. For instance, stating that Healthcare and Agriculture both started at 2 million in 1960 is accurate, but the description of the final figures in 2020 is slightly confusing and lacks clarity in comparison. The overview is clear and provides a good summary of the main trends, which is essential for a high band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear, moving from general trends to specific data. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as the phrase 'in 2020 it felt to 13 million' (which should be 'fell') and the transition 'in Retail it started'. The paragraphing is appropriate, but the flow between sentences could be smoother with more varied linking words to connect the comparisons between sectors more effectively.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upward trajectories', 'dramatic rise', and 'economic sectors'. There are some minor errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'by the end of timeframe' (missing an article) and 'it felt to 13 million' (a spelling error for 'fell'). While you attempt to use less common vocabulary, the precision is occasionally lacking. To reach a higher band, focus on using more sophisticated collocations and ensuring that word forms are used correctly in context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are several grammatical errors that detract from the quality. For example, 'Healthcare exhibiting the most dramatic rise' is a sentence fragment. There are also issues with verb tense and word choice, such as 'it felt to 13 million' instead of 'it fell to 13 million'. Punctuation is inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and capitalization (e.g., 'Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare' in the intro). Improving control over these basic structures will significantly boost your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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