Band 7.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.5)

The graph illustrates the number of jobs available in four different sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, employment in the retail and healthcare sectors increased significantly over the period. In contrast, the number of jobs in manufacturing and agriculture declined. While manufacturing remained one of the largest employment sectors for most of the period, healthcare became the leading sector by 2020. Agriculture, meanwhile, was consistently the smallest employer.

In 1960, approximately 15 million people were employed in the manufacturing sector. This figure peaked at 20 million in 1980 before declining steadily to around 13 million by 2020. Regarding agriculture, about 6 million jobs were available in 1960. The number then fell to 3 million in 1980 and remained stable until 2000, after which it decreased further to roughly 2 million in 2020.

On the other hand, the retail and healthcare sectors experienced considerable growth throughout the period. In 1960, there were around 6 million jobs in retail and only 2 million in healthcare. By 1980, these figures had risen to 10 million and 5 million respectively. Employment in both sectors continued to increase, reaching approximately 15 million in retail and 16 million in healthcare by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response provides a clear overview of the job market in the four sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020. Key trends are effectively highlighted, such as the significant increase in retail and healthcare jobs and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. Data is accurately reported and compared where relevant. However, the introduction could be slightly more detailed, particularly about the sectors covered, which would enhance the initial context. Overall, this demonstrates strong task achievement with relevant insights.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The overall structure of the response is logical, with a clear introduction, followed by detailed paragraphs discussing each sector. The use of transitions such as 'on the other hand' helps in making comparisons between the sectors. However, the paragraphs might benefit from more cohesive devices to enhance flow between ideas, particularly when discussing numerical changes. The closing statement could have summarized the significance of these changes more effectively to create a stronger conclusion.

Lexical Resource — Band 7.0

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, with some varied word choices such as 'illustrates', 'significant', and 'declined'. However, phrases like 'stayed stable' could be improved for precision. Some words are repeated (e.g., 'employment'), which might limit lexical variety. The response correctly uses terms relevant to the topic, though synonyms or more varied expressions could enhance the writing quality further. Overall, the lexical resource is solid but could benefit from further diversification.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.0

The grammar in the response is mostly accurate, with correct sentence structures demonstrated throughout. There are a few minor errors, such as 'the number then fell to 3 million in 1980 and remained stable until 2000' which could be clearer in context (consider specifying what 'stable' denotes). However, these do not impact overall communication. The use of past tense is appropriate for the context of discussing historical data, and punctuation is sufficient to guide the reader. Overall, grammatical range and accuracy are strong with minor room for improvement.

Overall feedback

Your response effectively summarizes the data presented, showcasing an understanding of the employment changes in the US economy across four sectors. You provided clear comparisons and supported your statements with relevant figures, which adds to the overall strength of your analysis. To improve further, consider enhancing your introduction with more context and using varied vocabulary to minimize repetition. Additionally, reinforcing the conclusion with a summary of your main points could strengthen your response and provide closure. Focus on refining cohesion and developing your ideas fully to achieve a higher score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.