Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The given line chart illustrates the number of jobs available in different sectors which include manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the United States from the year 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the number of opportunities to work kept on increasing between 1960 and 2020 for the healthcare and retail sectors. On the other hand, the manufacturing industry saw a rise in the number of jobs; however, after the initial few years the number of jobs kept on decreasing till 2020. The agriculture sector never saw an increase in jobs between the given years.

The healthcare sector had about 2 million, whereas the retail sector had 6 million jobs in 1980. Nevertheless, both of the industries saw a large increase in available jobs throughout the given timeline. Both industries reached peak in terms of job availability in 2020, with 16 million jobs available across each sector. The healthcare sector had 5 million and the retail sector had 10 million jobs in 1980. In 2000, the number of jobs increased to 11 million and 15 million in the healthcare and retail sectors respectively.

Initially, in 1960 the manufacturing industry had 15 million jobs which were the highest as compared to all other sectors in the same year. Moreover, the number increased to 20 million in 1980, after this the number of jobs kept on declining reaching 13 million in 2020. Conversely, the number of jobs in the agriculture sector was 6 million in 1960 and kept on reducing reaching just 2 million jobs in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the growth in healthcare and retail and the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. However, there are significant inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you state that the healthcare sector had 2 million jobs in 1980, but later claim it had 5 million in the same year. Similarly, the claim that both healthcare and retail reached 16 million in 2020 is not supported by the provided data trends. While the main features are identified, the inconsistency in reporting specific figures undermines the accuracy of the summary. To improve, ensure that data points are carefully cross-referenced with the graph before writing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear, moving from the growing sectors to the declining ones. Cohesive devices such as 'On the other hand', 'Nevertheless', and 'Conversely' are used effectively to signal transitions between ideas. However, the internal cohesion within the third paragraph is slightly weakened by the contradictory data points mentioned, which makes the comparison feel disjointed. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different trends, and the overall structure provides a clear framework for the reader to follow.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the information, using terms like 'opportunities', 'availability', 'declining', and 'respectively'. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, though some phrasing is slightly repetitive (e.g., 'number of jobs' is used frequently). The word choice is generally accurate and appropriate for an academic report. To reach a higher band, try to incorporate more varied synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and avoid repeating the same sentence structures when describing data points.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There is good control over basic grammar, and errors are infrequent and do not impede communication. You successfully use complex sentences, such as 'The healthcare sector had about 2 million, whereas the retail sector had 6 million jobs in 1980.' There are minor issues with punctuation and phrasing, such as 'reached peak' (should be 'reached a peak'), but these are minor slips. The grammatical control is generally strong, with most sentences being error-free.

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