Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line graph below illustrates the number of jobs, in four sectors of the US economy between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, healthcare was the largest employer with approximately 16 million jobs in 2020, followed by retail at 15 million. Agriculture was at 3 million when it started in 1960 and then gradually fallen and remained the smallest sector throughout the period.

In contrast, healthcare saw the most dramatic increase, rising consistently from 5 million to 16 million. Manufacturing was on its peak when it started from 15 million in 1960 and then showed a rapid increase at 20 million in 1980. Afterwards, it dropped at 13 million in 2020.

Retail also grew steadily from 7 million to 15 million.

Agriculture was the only sector to decline slightly, dropping from 3 million to just under 2 million jobs.

The graph shows a clear shift in employment from manufacturing and agriculture to healthcare and retail over the 60 year period.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all key features of the graph, including the overall trends and specific data points for the four sectors. You successfully identified the shift in employment patterns and provided a clear overview. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reporting. For instance, you stated manufacturing reached 20 million in 1980, but the graph shows it peaked earlier, and you described agriculture as having 'fallen' when it actually remained relatively stable or showed a slight decline. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are read precisely and that descriptions of trends (e.g., 'gradually fallen') accurately reflect the visual evidence provided in the graph.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding summary. The progression of ideas is easy to follow. You use some cohesive devices like 'In contrast' and 'Afterwards' to link ideas. However, the paragraphing is slightly fragmented; the final two sentences are very short and could have been integrated into the previous paragraph to improve flow. Additionally, some transitions between sentences feel a bit mechanical. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring paragraphs are balanced in length would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'sectors', 'economy', 'dramatic increase', and 'steadily'. However, there are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'Manufacturing was on its peak' is non-standard; 'reached its peak' would be more natural. Similarly, 'started from 15 million' is slightly awkward. To improve, focus on using more precise collocations for describing trends and peaks. The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main points clearly, but it lacks the sophistication and flexibility required for higher band scores.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'gradually fallen' (should be 'gradually fell') and 'dropped at 13 million' (should be 'dropped to 13 million'). These errors do not impede communication, but they do indicate a lack of control over tense and preposition usage. While you attempt complex sentences, the accuracy is inconsistent. To improve, pay closer attention to verb tenses when describing past trends and ensure that prepositions following verbs like 'drop' or 'increase' are used correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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