Band 8.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 8.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-21

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 8.5)

The line graph illustrates how employment levels (in millions) evolved across four US economic sectors — Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare — between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the data reveals a structural economic shift: Manufacturing declined after peaking in 1980, while Healthcare and Retail grew steadily, with Agriculture remaining minimal and stable post-1980.

In 1960, Manufacturing employed 15 million workers — the highest of all sectors — rising to 20 million by 1980 before falling sharply to 13 million by 2020. Conversely, Healthcare started at only 2 million but surged dramatically after 1980, reaching 16 million — an eightfold increase — effectively matching Retail, which climbed consistently from 6 million to 16 million over the period. Agriculture, meanwhile, dropped from 6 million to 3 million by 1980 and then plateaued, showing no significant change thereafter.

This trend underscores a pronounced transition from industrial to service-oriented employment, accentuating the burgeoning dominance of Healthcare and Retail, juxtaposed with the contraction of traditional sectors.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response8.5
Coherence and Cohesion8.5
Lexical Resource8.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy8.5
Overall8.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 8.5

The response is excellent. You have successfully identified the main features of the graph, including the peak and subsequent decline of Manufacturing, the steady growth of Healthcare and Retail, and the stability of Agriculture. The overview is clear and effectively captures the structural shift in the US economy. You have also made relevant comparisons, such as noting that Healthcare and Retail reached the same level by 2020. The data is accurately reported, and the inclusion of specific figures supports your analysis well. The response is well-balanced and fully addresses all parts of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 8.5

The essay is logically organized with a clear progression of ideas. Each paragraph has a distinct focus: the introduction, the overview, the detailed body paragraph, and a concluding summary. Cohesive devices such as 'Conversely', 'meanwhile', and 'juxtaposed with' are used naturally and effectively to link information. The paragraphing is skillful, and the flow of information from the general trend to specific data points is smooth and easy to follow. There is no evidence of mechanical or repetitive use of linking words.

Lexical Resource — Band 8.5

You demonstrate a wide and sophisticated range of vocabulary. The use of terms such as 'structural economic shift', 'surged dramatically', 'plateaued', 'burgeoning dominance', and 'contraction' is precise and appropriate for an academic report. The collocations are natural, and there are no errors in word choice. You have successfully used a variety of verbs and nouns to describe trends, which adds to the clarity and professional tone of the writing. This is a very strong performance in terms of lexical range and accuracy.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 8.5

The grammar is highly accurate throughout the response. You have used a variety of complex sentence structures, such as the participial phrase 'accentuating the burgeoning dominance...' and the use of dashes for parenthetical information, which are handled correctly. Punctuation is used effectively to manage the flow of complex ideas. There are no grammatical errors, and the control over tense and subject-verb agreement is consistent. The writing is error-free, demonstrating full flexibility and control over the language.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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