Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, the highest number of the sector is manufacturing this sector is a highest at 20 million jobs in the year 1980. Looking at the data in more detail, the number of jobs in the manufacturing was at 15 million of jobs at year 1960, then rose at 20 million in 1980, then significantly fell at 13 million in 2020. Similarly , retail has increased their jobs within 6 years in 1960 it was at 6 million of jobs than in 1980 it was 10 million than climbed at 15 million in 2000, at the last it was at 16 million of jobs in the year 2020. Regarding the remaining figures, the agriculture was at 6 million and then dropped their jobs at 2 million from the 6 million in the year 2020. while healthcare jobs was at 2 million then they surged their jobs from 2 million to 16 million of jobs at the year of 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends, such as the peak in manufacturing and the growth in healthcare. However, the overview is weak; it focuses only on manufacturing rather than summarizing the most significant overall trends across the period. Some data points are imprecise, such as the claim that retail increased 'within 6 years' when the data spans 60 years. While the main features are reported, the lack of a comprehensive overview and some inaccuracies in data interpretation prevent a higher score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is somewhat mechanical. The use of cohesive devices is repetitive, particularly the frequent use of 'then' and 'at the year of'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, such as 'their jobs' when referring to sectors. While the essay is coherent enough to follow, the lack of varied linking words and the somewhat disjointed sentence structure limit the flow of information.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks variety and precision. There is significant repetition of phrases like 'number of jobs' and 'at the year of'. Some word choices are unnatural, such as 'the highest number of the sector is manufacturing' or 'surged their jobs'. The range is limited, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or sophisticated collocations that would demonstrate a higher level of control.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with prepositions ('at year 1960', 'at the year of 2020') and articles ('the agriculture', 'the healthcare jobs'). Subject-verb agreement and pluralization are also inconsistent (e.g., 'manufacturing this sector is a highest'). While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of errors in basic grammar and the lack of complex sentence structures constrain the score.
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