Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-22
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The given polyline chart depicts the count of jobs in distinct four fields of the economy in the UK from to 1960 to 2020 .
Overall , it is clear that healthcare area followed decreasing over the given time period . interestingly , retail and agriculture jobs were followed increasing .
To begin with , 20 millions people had been worked in manufactural field in the initial year . in the manufacturing sector , 15 million masses were interested doing work ,which was 7 millions individuals than healthcare job . Apart from it , almost similar , 6 millions people were worked in the retail and agriculture .
Moving Further , in the 2000,17 millions masses had been interested doing work in manufacturing , followed by 15 million and 11 people in retail and agricultural fields . Furthermore , in retail , agricultural and manufacturing jobs were worked 16 and 14 millions people , respectively . Finally , the lowest 2 millions masses were worked in healthcare area in the 2020 .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarize the data but fails to accurately report the main features. There are significant inaccuracies in data interpretation, such as stating the healthcare sector decreased when the graph shows it as the highest sector in 2020. Furthermore, the description of trends is confusing and contradictory, particularly in the final paragraph where the data points provided do not align with the visual information. The overview is present but lacks clarity. To improve, you must ensure that the data you report matches the graph exactly and that you clearly distinguish between the four sectors throughout the period.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. While transition signals like 'To begin with' and 'Moving Further' are used, they do not always lead to coherent information. The referencing is often unclear, and the internal structure of the paragraphs is disjointed. The flow of ideas is frequently interrupted by confusing data reporting, which makes it difficult for the reader to follow the trends over time. Improving the logical grouping of data—perhaps by grouping sectors by their growth or decline—would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is limited and often used incorrectly. Phrases like '15 million masses' and 'manufactural field' are unnatural and imprecise. There is a lack of variety in reporting verbs and nouns, leading to repetitive phrasing. You rely on basic vocabulary, and the misuse of terms like 'masses' and 'individuals' in place of 'people' or 'workers' hinders the professional tone required for an Academic Task 1 report. Expanding your range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and learning appropriate collocations for economic data will help you achieve a higher score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'people had been worked'), incorrect tense usage, and awkward sentence structures (e.g., 'retail and agriculture jobs were followed increasing'). The use of passive voice is often forced and grammatically incorrect. While there is an attempt to use complex structures, they are consistently flawed. Focusing on basic sentence construction and ensuring correct verb forms will be essential for improving your accuracy and clarity.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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