Band 7.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 7.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 7.0)

The provided line graph illustrates the change in the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the United States from the year 1960 to 2020. Overall, employment in manufacturing and agriculture industries experienced a downward trend, whereas the retail and healthcare sectors experienced substantial growth. Although manufacturing sectors employed the largest number of people initially, healthcare overtook it at the end of the period.

In 1960, manufacturing industries provided occupations to 15 million people, which then peaked at 20 million by 1980, before dropping to about 18 million by 2000. This figure continued declining until it reached about 8 million in 2020. In contrast, the healthcare sector employed only about 3 million of people, making it the smallest sector of the economy. The figure rose to 5 million in 1980 and showed steady growth reaching around 16 million in 2020.

Retail and agriculture sectors accounted for around 6 million jobs in 1960. In the year 1980, retail sectors followed an upward trend at about 10 million, before peaking at 15 million and subsequently, increased to about 16 million. In contrast, agriculture sectors declined dramatically to around 3 million and plateaued at this figure until 2000. It decreased slightly to about 2 million, making it the sector with the fewest jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The response effectively addresses all parts of the task. You have provided a clear overview of the trends and successfully selected key features to compare, such as the crossover between healthcare and manufacturing. The data is accurately reported, and the comparison between the sectors is well-integrated. To reach a higher band, ensure that all data points are described with maximum precision; for instance, the retail sector's peak is described as 'about 15 million' and then 'increased to about 16 million', which is slightly ambiguous. Overall, the response is well-structured and covers the requirements of the prompt thoroughly.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.5

The response is logically organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a logical progression of ideas. You use cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'whereas', and 'subsequently' effectively to link information. Paragraphing is used appropriately to group related sectors. The flow of information is smooth, and the relationship between the different sectors is easy to follow. To improve further, ensure that referencing is always precise; for example, 'the figure' is used frequently, which is clear, but ensure it always points back to the intended subject without ambiguity.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.5

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey information with precision. Phrases like 'downward trend', 'substantial growth', and 'plateaued' are used effectively in an academic context. There are some minor issues with collocation, such as 'provided occupations to' (better: 'provided jobs for') and 'about 3 million of people' (the 'of' is unnecessary). However, these errors do not impede communication. To move to a higher band, try to incorporate more sophisticated synonyms for 'number' or 'figure' and ensure that collocations are consistently natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 7.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as the use of 'Although' clauses and relative clauses. Most sentences are error-free, and the grammar is generally accurate. There are occasional minor slips, such as 'retail sectors followed an upward trend at about 10 million' (the preposition 'at' is slightly awkward here) and '3 million of people'. These are minor and do not affect the clarity of the report. The control of punctuation is good, and the overall grammatical accuracy is high enough to support clear communication.

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