Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph illustrates the number of jobs in 4 different fields of US economy from1960 to 2020.

From the graph it can be seen that jobs in agriculture remains the lowest. Jobs in retail and healthcare sector continuously increased from 1960 to 2020. In last, Jobs in manufacturing field peaked in 1980 but continued to fall down till 2020.

On one hand, 15 million jobs were in the manufacturing, which further more increased to 20 million, but in 2000, less than 20 million jobs were left. In 2020 that graph steeped down to less than 15milion. On the other hand, approximately 5 million jobs were created in retail sector, which kept on growing to 10 million in 1980, followed by 15 million in 2000 and a bit more in 2020.

Whereas, in healthcare sector there were less than 5 million jobs in 1960,which reached 5 million in 1980 and crossed 10 million in 2000. by 2020 number of jobs touched 15 million. In agriculture sector, drastic decrease was seen from 1960 to 1980 from 5 million to 2.5 million approximately. From 1980 to 2000 number of jobs almost remained same and then again dropped in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the overview is somewhat weak; it lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends or the overall relationship between the sectors. While the data is generally accurate, the description of the manufacturing sector is slightly confusing, as the text mentions a peak in 1980 but the data provided in the body paragraph is inconsistent with the visual trend. To improve, ensure the overview highlights the most striking differences, such as the clear divergence between the service-based sectors and the primary/secondary sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is logically organized into paragraphs, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a clear progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'Whereas,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the paragraphing could be improved by grouping the sectors more effectively (e.g., grouping the growing sectors together versus the declining ones). Referencing is generally clear, though the flow between sentences in the third paragraph is occasionally disjointed due to the repetitive structure of reporting figures.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, allowing for a clear description of trends using terms like 'peaked,' 'steeped down,' and 'drastic decrease.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'In last' (instead of 'Finally') and 'steeped down' (which is not standard usage for describing a graph). The range is somewhat limited, relying on basic verbs to describe movement. To reach a higher band, incorporate more precise academic vocabulary, such as 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a downward trend.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including missing articles ('in retail and healthcare sector'), subject-verb agreement issues ('jobs in agriculture remains'), and punctuation errors (e.g., '2000. by 2020'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on consistent use of articles, correct verb tense agreement, and ensuring that sentences are properly punctuated, especially when introducing new clauses or time markers.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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