Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The graph below shows the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. Overall, The number of Retail and Healthcare dramatically grew through this period. On the other hand, the figure of Manufacturing and Agriculture sharply declined. Regarding Manufacturing, the number started 15 in 1960. Subsequently, the number dramatically increased at 20 in 1980. After that, the number sharply decreased from 20 in 1980 to around 13 in 2020. Next is Agriculture, the figure began to about 5. After that, the figure slightly continued to decline between about 5 in 1960 and approximately 2 in 2020. As for Retail, the figure started approximately 5 in 1960, and the figure kept increasing from about 5 in 1960 to around 15 in 2020. Last is Healthcare, the number started about 3 in 1960. By contrast, the number dramatically rose between 3 and around 15 in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview of the trends. However, the data reporting is somewhat mechanical and lacks a cohesive analytical approach. While the main features are identified, the response relies heavily on listing figures for each sector individually rather than making meaningful comparisons between them. For instance, the report would be stronger if it highlighted that Healthcare and Retail overtook the other sectors by the end of the period. The inclusion of specific data points is accurate, but the overall structure feels like a series of isolated sentences rather than a well-integrated summary.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organised into a single paragraph, which makes it difficult to follow the progression of ideas. While there is a logical attempt to group the sectors (those that grew vs. those that declined), the lack of paragraphing is a significant weakness. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the other hand' and 'Subsequently', but they are often used in a repetitive or mechanical way. The flow between sentences is somewhat choppy, and the text would benefit greatly from clear paragraph breaks to separate the overview from the detailed body analysis.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task but remains quite basic and repetitive. Phrases like 'the number started' and 'the figure' are used repeatedly, which limits the sophistication of the writing. There are some attempts at descriptive language, such as 'dramatically grew' and 'sharply declined', which are appropriate for describing trends. However, to achieve a higher band, you should vary your verbs and nouns (e.g., 'witnessed a surge', 'experienced a downward trend', 'the proportion of jobs'). Spelling is generally accurate, but the lexical variety is restricted.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response uses a mix of simple and some complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. For example, 'the number started 15' should be 'the number started at 15', and 'the figure began to about 5' is grammatically incorrect. There are also issues with preposition usage and article placement throughout the text. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. To improve, focus on ensuring that your verb phrases are complete and that prepositions are used correctly with numerical data.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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