Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-08-23
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of occupations in the Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare sectors of the economy in the United States from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the number of jobs in healthcare rose steadily throughout the period, while manufacturing jobs experienced a decline from 1960 to 2020. However, the highest number of jobs was in manufacturing in 1960, whereas the least number of jobs was in healthcare.
In 1960, the maximum number of jobs was in manufacturing, which accounted for 15 million, while in the following year it peaked at about 20 million; after that, it declined steadily over the time period, and in 2020 it was just below 15 million. However, healthcare was the lowest around 2.5 million in 1960 and saw an increase about 16 million. In 1960, the number of agricultural jobs faced a decline over the period from around 6 million to under 5 million in 2020, while retail experienced significant increase over the years, which was at 16 million same as healthcare in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends, such as the steady rise in healthcare and the decline in manufacturing. However, the analysis is slightly hampered by inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, stating that manufacturing peaked at 20 million in the 'following year' (1961) is an over-interpretation of the graph, and the claim that retail was 'same as healthcare' in 2020 is imprecise. While the main features are highlighted, the lack of precision in describing the data points prevents the response from reaching a higher band. The overview is clear, but the supporting details need to be more accurate to fully satisfy the requirements.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. Cohesive devices such as 'while', 'however', 'after that', and 'in the following year' are used to link ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as the phrase 'which was at 16 million same as healthcare in 2020' at the end of the final paragraph, which lacks a smooth connection to the preceding clause. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the overview from the specific data analysis.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'occupations', 'sectors', 'accounted for', and 'experienced a decline'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'the least number of jobs was in healthcare' (which should be 'the lowest number') and 'saw an increase about 16 million' (missing the preposition 'to'). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the meaning, it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as missing articles ('in healthcare', 'in manufacturing') and prepositional errors ('increase about 16 million'). The sentence 'In 1960, the number of agricultural jobs faced a decline over the period from around 6 million to under 5 million in 2020' is well-constructed, but other sentences are clunky. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score to a 6.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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